Decision to stay in Japan

Hi. I was hoping maybe someone could help me out with my dilemma. So ever since I came to Japan as a foreign exchange student, I haven't been sure whether or not I should stay the full year. Here are the reasons why I'm unsure.

To start, my relationship with my host mother has been rocky. We have different opinions, and I respect that we both come from different cultures, but there are times when I think that she, in general is a mean person. I'm not sure if she comes off as strict or not since my own mother really isn't strict, but I personally think that my host mother can be rude and awful to deal with. Just about a month ago I told my liaison ( person who guides and supports you during trip) that I either wanted to switch host families or go back home. In the end, I decided to give it another try with my first host family. Things started becoming good, but recently my host mother is now being mean again. I want to make it up to her but I think that this mean attitude of hers has gone on for way too long.

The second thing is my liaison. At times I feel like I can't talk to her because I feel that she doesn't support me. I understand that English is not her first language and I guess language really isn't the issue. I just feel like I can't come to her for problems because all she'll tell me is Good Luck!, which doesn't help at all.

The last thing is homesickness. I am starting to feel homesick and due to that, I've been more moodier and depressed. I feel like crying whenever I remember my home. I hate that I haven't been a very good host student. Truth be told I tend to tell myself that if I went back home then I wouldn't be in anyone's way anymore, or that I wouldn't cause anymore problems. Now I don't even want to go to my after school clubs anymore because I've been feeling down.

What should I do? I don't want to feel depressed like this anymore. Can anyone give me some advice or tips?

Thanks

leave, you will be sick.

More context needed. How old are you? How well do you speak Japanese? What you seem to be experiencing is difficulty to adapt to life in Japan, and it is very often caused by poor language skills rather than any (real or imagined) "cultural differences".

I think you failed to adapt to the Japan.
just go home.
the most important thing you have to know is that "do not compare and criticize the place where you currently stay and the persons, who are around you , if you want to stay there."

you seems to be too young to know others.

the most important thing you have to know is that "do not compare and criticize the place where you currently stay and the persons, who are around you , if you want to stay there."

You could have said to "make the best of your situation", but to put it the way you did... trying to think of a nice way to say... that that is a load of crap.

On second reading...

At times I feel like I can't talk to her because I feel that she doesn't support me. I understand that English is not her first language and I guess language really isn't the issue.

Language is very much the issue, you need look no further. Being unable to interact with your environment in a satisfying manner creates frustration, anger and sadness (at least in some people, which seems to include you). This may or may not be the primary reason of your bad relationship with your host mother, but it's almost certainly the core reason why you feel, for example, that you are a burden on others.

Sadly, this problem does not have an immediate solution: learning a language takes time, and although you will notice gradual improvement as you study, it may not be sufficient. But if you want to eventually live fruitfully in Japan, there is no way around it.

In the short term, you can either call it quits and go back home now, possibly to come back later when the time is right, or stay and lower your expectations a bit to try to have a good time even though the experience will not be as fulfilling as you imagined. There is no good or bad choice here, do what you feel is best.

to yllwsmrf
I think she is making the best of her situation. that is the problem.
she needs to abandon to make efforts.
she has been doing her best. therefore, probably, she is requesting others,to give their best to her, to appreciate her efforts, and to understand (and solve) her problems. that is the origin of the problem. she is making problems by herself.
I think she can't stop making her efforts. ( it is hard for a honest person to be dishonest.)

the similar situations happen very often even among Japanese.
returning to the original circumstance is the best (and probably the only one) to rescue her from this situation.
from the place, where her efforts are not rewarded, to the place, where her efforts have been rewarded.

in Japanese, we say it "‚µ‚«‚è‚È‚¨‚µ","Žd�Ø‚è’¼‚µ".

Things you haven't stated- your age, how much research did you do before going to Japan, do you speak any/are you learning Japanese? Frustraton levels (both sides) can often be judged by the amount of effort put in.
Returning to your original homestay was probably a mistake. Being elsewhere would have given you the opportunity to "compare notes". You are obviously unhappy where you are, so you have two choices- move on or go home. Homesickness is always an issue, particularly if you are in unfamiliar territory.
The first thing you have to do is look at yourself, are you making an effort or feeling sorry for yourself.
Japan is a wonderful country with welcoming people. Think clearly when making a decision. Good luck.

I have to agree that you have failed to adapt in Japan. Living in Japan is really hard if you dont know language,c ustoms, culture etc.

You need to be prepared before coming to Japan.But its too late for ya. Either start adapting by learning languages and making friends beside you host mother and your guide. It will be difficult, but its your choice. If you aren't up to the challenge or if you aren't happy here, then returning back to your country may be a good decision.
REmember being happy is important. If you aren;t happy at what you are doing right now then, you are doing something wrong.
So, its totally up to you.

ken,

Fair enough, and I apologize for my response. Your original answer, as with many of your posts as of late, comes off as flippant and rude, but it makes more sense once you put it into context.

Why not write more like that in the future? Cause as it stands, I think a lot of your advice is being disregarded out of hand due to the (unintentional?) tone of your posts.

I did a student exchange program when I was 21.
Not in Japan but in Finland. At the time there was no internet and no cell phones, in any country.
I couldn't even find a guidebook on Finland in my big home town.
All I had was an address in a Finnish town quite a way from Helsinki.
My mother tongue is not English by the way.
Before that I travelled in Spain and Italy several times, and could at least read all sorts of signs and guess the meaning.. but Finnish!?
All the same I had no problem travelling by train to the other town.
I was supposed to share a small cottage by the sea with 1 Finnish student ..2 weeks later another one arrived.

We were 3 young guys of the same age so we got along well, especially with the 2nd student, who invited me every other weekend to stay with him in the home of one of the many families he knew...

The 2 students were actually checking all sorts of things on a suspension bridge being built; I went along with them, watching the construction, taking notes, asking many questions, as back home I studied the construction of bridges, roads, sewers and more.
The managers, secretaries etc. were all very friendly..even thought we all had to use dictionaries...and I did learn some basic Finnish.
This is still one of the best memories in my life.. I enjoyed everything, including going to a very hot sauna, then jumping in the ice cold sea, back to the sauna, back to the sea.. both right after lunch, then after work.

The following year a guy from my college went to Finland.. same job, same company, different location, still by the sea.
He came back mad as...he hated every single day as everything was too different from our country

What I meant to say (never post half asleep in the middle of the night ) is that some people adapt easily to other countries, regions, people while others don't.

After I moved to North-America my mom came to see me one month a year for years.
She always came when I was working as she wanted to be alone during the day (her job required her to see hundreds of people a day) and she explored my town on her own..she barely spoke English but managed very well (she could read English).

Dad came with her one year..he didn't like it at all! his main beef was not being able to drive at 150-200 km/hr as he did back home..

You're having a hard time adopting to life in Japan--different language, culture and living among strangers. It is not easy I understand. Plus you're homesick--I understand that too. I experienced both first hand. But hang in there and complete your program. If you go home now, you're going to be a quitter the rest of your life. Come on, be strong!!

just immerse yourself in wallpapers, screensavers, what u can find on the internet.

remember "wherever you go - there you are!"