Do Japanese say "I Love You"?

ive been living in japan, for a couple of years now. anyways, it was hard for my ex girlfriend to say i love you( aishiteru) also, but she says daisuki, (i like you a lot) to me. ive asked my japanese friends why and they said, that word is too strong to be said. Maybe it was just puppy love. I wouldnt know anything about married couple so im sorry that i cant help out. My ex girlfriend is from Osaka area so she's very modest. my other ex is from tokyo and she says it sometimes, but too busy to say it in any of our conversation, we would say i love you in english because people in tokyo are americanized! yes! there are many americans like me in japan its insane!! my current girlfriend is from nagasaki and she would say aishiteru because they are very conservative here. By the way, if not married, japanese girls do go back after college and live with their parents; 22-30yrs old. unlike us americans, if we turn 18 we have to move out.

With all these tips, my only advice is to know that person you are with completly. The japanese are very polite. so even though they would say yes and have a smiley face, you just got to know that person to be able to tell the difference. they can be two faced like us; they are regular people like us. But, the japanese do act what they say. meaning, you're be able to understand them just by reading their movements or reactions. its like getting burned, you would say ouch and may or may not show reaction. the japanese would say itai (i-tai) (ouch) and would completely react. just imagine that whenever your talking your hands just move like you're rapping or something. whenever the japanese people talk they would show it by their actions.

Japanese has their own way of how to express their feelings toward one another.If you are fine with the relationship and respect his/her decision of not saying "I love u" then no problem but if you you are so concern about your relationship with this person because he/she doesnt say "I love you" then dont be with him/her. Foreigners and Japanese have different opinions and cultural differences we dont think alike.Most Japanese dont feel comfortable of saying "I love you" I mean theyre just words does it have to be necessary to say it. what is more important is how you feel about one another if you care and respect each other everything will be fine.

Words are like mirrors! Feelings reflect your true personality. Kind regards!

P.S. : TE IUBESC in Romanian means I LOVE YOU in English [for people who want to know]
sorry for my bad english. respect to all.

nice opinion. your opinion is great.

i have never heard somebody saying aishiteru in my life.
that almost means "will you marry me?" or "farewell".
anyway , i love you seems to me the best way to express ones feeling.

Personally I am not the kind of person to say I love you a lot. Especially the Dutch equivalent (ik hou van je) to me has always sounded a bit too dramatic. But since I talk in English to my girlfriend, I find that I have no trouble saying I love you in English to her. I have said it twice since I met her. And both times were when I was about to leave her at the airport. About the first time, I think I even kinda regret saying it. It was a little too early, but she didn't seem to mind.

I also had this little discussion with my girlfriend once. She told me Japanese tend not to say I love you just because it's such a big thing to say. It's embarassing, even when they do experience this feeling.

As a western person, it makes you wonder, why do I find it so important that she confirms her love in words. It made realize that I am perfectly able never to hear these words from her in my live. I think western society, and especially Hollywood movies, have given us all the find of false idea that in order for a relationship to be serious and meaningful, at some point we have to start saying I love you to each other.

I find the Japanese answer to this much more satisfying: spend more time showing your love to meaningful gestures. Words are just words. Right now I am starting to learn Japanese language, so that hopefully one day I can have a conversation with my gf's friends and parents, but I am finding out that so many words in English and Dutch are not spoken out in Japanese. I also noticed this when i had a minor argument with my girlfriend this winter. Whereas I wanted to talk things out, she was more occupied with dealing with the emotions herself. Perhaps this difference is merely individual, but I think in general there is some eveidence that Japanese don't think it's that necessary to talk about everything, especially feelings.

So, for me, I don't have any problems with my girlfriend not saying I Love You. I know that she loves me through the way she looks at me, stays loyal to me on the other side of the world, etc, etc. Ofcourse she says other things that are equally sweet for me like sweetheart, or I Like You. She even said "I am yours" once which to me sounded a lot stronger than the English I Love You which, through the appearance in so many Hollywood films and TV Shows, has kinda lost it's power.

As a final word, my girlfriend also has no problem with me saying I Love You to her. I always tell her that if she doesn't feel like saying it back, she shouldn't. But if I feel like saying it, she never holds me back. I think it's the best way of dealing with this cultural difference.

hi, i'm curious on how to say i love you but you love him.. i am curious because... i have this best friend that i love, but he loves someone else.. and whenever i see them hug or kiss it just tears my heart into pieces, so i want to try to tell him how i feel but in a different language so he won't understand


can u help me?

In Japan there are 1,000 ways to not say ''I love you''

My wife (from Japan) was on the phone with her mom. She was laughing and having a funny conversation, and I delighted in her joy. When their conversation paused, I was enthralled by their cute sounding conversation and told my wife ''I *love* you!!'' ... suddenly I heard her mom through the phone sounding very upset and surprised. Like on the Flintstones cartoons where you can hear the other person on the phone from 5 feet away.

There was some conversation and my wife told me ''Don't worry, my mom was just surprised that you would say such a thing to me.'' I said ''We're married!'', and my wife explained that in Japan there is an intense aversion to coming right out and saying such things.

But she explained it all to her mom (who is a very well traveled and sophisticated woman by the way, so that might have helped things). Now whenever my wife passes the phone to me to say ''Hi'' to her mom, I always say ''Ohayo, mama chan! We miss you and we love you!'' and she giggles and laughs a little bit uncomfortably, but she seems to actually think it is kind of cute that her foreigner son-in-law says such nutty things.

But still, my mother-in-law ''gets it''. She sees that some foreigners have their own ways, that the words are meant most genuinely, but that it is like a ''local custom''. Like in some countries where you kiss someone on both cheeks when you meet them.

Once my wife watched a movie we got from Japan that made her cry. I asked what was wrong, and she said ''Nothing, that guy on the screen just indicated to the woman that he loves her so much! It got me all emotional.''
''What did he say?'' I asked.
She sobbed as she told me his romantic line ... ''He said: 'You are good at cooking and I like to eat.'''
I burst out laughing and she got quite irritated at me for spoiling the romance of the scene.

One of my Japanese uncles was very upset about things pertaining to a recent death in the family and a family gathering we went to under those gloomy circumstances. We were outside on the sidewalk, and suddenly he looked at us with a look of great surprise and ran inside the house. I was terrified and asked what was wrong. My wife whispered to me that he went inside because he was afraid he would cry in front of everyone. It would have been culturally humiliating. I felt very guilty, because we are all family and yet he could not show us his feelings.

But still in spite of all this, my wife and I say ''I love you'' all of the time. That's just the way we happen to do it.

(Long post ... sorry!)

Kaycee, I'm sorry to hear you are in such a predicament. I hope that things will work out for you. You sound like a person who has a lot of strong feelings and love inside you.

If you remain a loving person in this world, things will come around some way or another. It might be with "him" ... or it might be someone else.

Either way I hope you will try to keep yourself balanced and as calm as you can, and also stay sincere no matter what happens.

Perhaps saying things in another language might help you to subdue your pain and discomfort, but perhaps sitting down and having a talk with him as calmly as you can will help you at least figure out whether or not you should just move on. It is scary and it hurts sometimes, but I think love is usually worth 'finding out'.

I'm crossing my fingers for you, and I hope you will know that there is a lot of love in this world. Love abounds, so try to be brave in knowing that, OK?

I don't know, but I think that 'I love you' and '愛してる' have slightly different meanings. I think this site explains it well: http://japanese.about.com/library/weekly/aa021101a.htm.
I think family is very important in Japan and maybe your wife is finding it very difficult and maybe a bit jealous to live so far from them as a person. It must be difficult to watch you go through pain with your treatment in a very new marriage in a place where everything is different and she also needs some support!
Maybe it's good to focus on healing and agree to keep in contact with emails and letters because you need your family and support too!
If you don't think there's any chance the relationship you have is going to work after this then maybe wait until after the chemotherapy treatment is completed until looking into that as I imagine a divorce would be stressful!

Well, i don't think that Japanese don't say the phrase "I love you". For a short period that i've been reading so many japanese phrase online, i don't know how to say "I love you" in japanese.

I had a boyfriend that i'd met in our school last time. And i did'nt expect that he also liked Japanese things. He had told me ONE TIME a phrase "Ai shiteru". I don't know what it means so, i researched it in the internet. And i found out that it means I love you. I'm so happy that finally, he expressed his feelings for me through verbal action.

So, when someone say "Ai shiteru" to you. You should be the luckiest guy/gal in the world. :)