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Hugging in Japan 2015/1/12 23:29
Is hugging common in Japan? What if a 'shy' Japanese guy hugs you 3x? Do you think it has an intimate meaning or its just a friendly gesture? Please help me guys. I only knew few about Japanese culture. Yoroshiku onegaishimasu!
by chembot  

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/13 11:06
Friends hug. Don't look too deeply into it.
by ... (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/13 11:33
There is no hug is common in Japan.
So when you hug to men is not so intimate, I think in some cases be mistaken that there is favor.
by haro1210 rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/13 12:34
Ok. So it means japanese boys hugs their friends?even with opposite sex?
by chembot rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/14 20:40
The first thing that happens in a typical Japanese approach to romance is holding hands.

If he hugged you without the hand-holding, he probably did that just to adjust himself to your culture.
by Uco (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/23 22:39
My take:

NO, it is absolutely NOT common in Japan. The only way you can get away with it is because you are gaijin and even then they will think you are strange. It won't help you blend in, it will make you strange and foreign.

Kissing in public is also really, REALLY rude. Even a kiss on the cheek in public is taboo.. DON'T DO IT. Also in Japan, kissing is pretty exclusively done during sex. So, even in private, unless you've already been to bed with them, or are about to, you don't do that either.

Holding hands is fine these days tho it also used to be taboo. But its not any more.
by basketcase rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/24 15:40
basketcase,

The OP is asking our take on Japanese boys hugging people.
by Uco (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/25 14:38
oh.. lol.. I read it the other way around... oops.
by basketcase rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/25 15:24
if you are asking Japanese boy's action in your country, it may vary, depending on their thinking. in general, they may try to adapt your culture.
by ken (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/28 13:29
If a Japanese guy is hugging you a bunch and he'e not completely drunk, then he is really strange... run away.. lol..

There *is* a chance that he'e heard that westerners hug a lot and he's trying (and failing) to be western. It may also be he has the hots for you and doesn't know how to show it..
by basketcase rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/29 19:09
Out of context, impossible for us to tell.

My landlady always gives me a big hug when I arrive and last time her boyfriend was present. So it can just be an act of friendship, perhaps with a nod towards our weird Western ways.

The flip side of this is that in anime/Jdrama, just saying 'I like you' is akin to a declaration of love likely to survive 3 seasons and an invasion of giant robots. Maybe that's just a subtitler's convention.

Ask a mutual acquaintance. They will either confirm that you are the apple of his eye, or do their best to suppress their chuckles.

As for kissing. Well, it's flu season, so nobody should be kissing anyone, but to question what another poster has written, surely Japanese people don't actually have to be having sex to kiss each other?!
by David (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/30 12:03
It depends, is this in your country or in Japan? I once went out with a Japanese guy in Osaka who hugged and kissed a lot on the first date, it was no big deal to him and he didn`t care what the strangers around us thought, but he was obviously the exception to the rule. It depends on how Western they consider themselves, if he has encountered Western culture a lot then hugging probably isn`t as big a deal to him than it would be to a typical Japanese dude who freaks out at the idea of even holding hands. But PDAs in public, in Japan, are quite rare, if people do want to kiss or hold hands they tend to go somewhere quiet eg: a park. If you are in Japan and a dude is hugging you in public then I think that`s a pretty strong sign he likes you.
by Jinx77 (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/30 12:50
lol.. Its only like the past 20, 15 or maybe even just 10 years where couples would even hold hands in public much less hug or kiss. You want to find yourself dumped by your J GF without ever knowing why? Try kissing her in public a few times, that is, if she doesn't blow up on you on the spot and get super pissed off.. The Japanese just are NOT a kissing culture like the west is. It *has* gotten a little more lenient in very recent years but its still not acceptable in public.

Sadly, this also means that many of them are TERRIBLE kissers.. lol..
by basketcase rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/30 15:26
lol.. Its only like the past 20, 15 or maybe even just 10 years where couples would even hold hands in public much less hug or kiss.

You're obviously younger than 25 or have ignored Japanese history up to that point.
by Uco (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/1/30 20:18
basketcase, who are you talking to? I am a woman, I don't have a J GF? My post was about a Japanase guy who kissed ME, did you even read it?
by Jinx77 (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/2/1 09:09

geez, I really miss the personal section here...
by Miyuki (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/2/2 10:15
Hey Basketcase, even if it didn't answer the OPs question I found it pretty interesting. Funnily enough my wife gets hugs or hand holding in Japan from other ladies (we are middle aged, so I suppose we aren't threatening). No ladies, middle aged or otherwise, ever offer to hug me :-(
by Lazy Pious (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/2/2 12:39
Whatever happened to the 'love and relations' section where people asked these kinds of questions?
by Chrissy (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: Hugging in Japan 2015/2/2 21:04
Still debating about differences between East and West...
I've been in a Japanese relationship for 10 years and I can tell you that new generations of Japanese are getting more Westernized than we are!
If you want to have a good picture of contemporary Japan look at teenagers: they hold hands, kiss, without being vulgar like many Westerners.
We should learn from them.
by John (guest) rate this post as useful

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