Restaurant companion while eating?

Hello, as I understand, in Japan every time one enters a restaurant, they expect each person to have a full meal order. This is understandable but Im travelling with a large group and on a budget. One of our members, my mother, is both highly allergic and diabetic. Her diet is quite strict. In many cases, she cannot order but will sit and talk with us during lunch while we finish.

Unfortunately, we've noticed that the restaurants turn groups away if one of their members does not order. Is there a way to circumvent this, or explain the situation to them?

Only it seems ridiculous and wasteful to order food no one will eat for a seat they would not give to anyone else anyway. Its rather frustrating as well that my mother is forced to wait outside the door while we are inside. I know business is business, but in many other countries having a companion while eating doesnt seem to be a problem. Is there something in their culture that considers this rude?

When were you turned away? Never heard of this?

as I understand, in Japan every time one enters a restaurant, they expect each person to have a full meal order.

That is not what I understand as a local resident, but anyway, have you considered booking in advance or just looking for a place where they can serve something that your mom can eat too? Wouldn't it be better if she can drink something rather than to just sit there?

restaurants in Japan are the eating places, not the places where people are chattering with no eating.
there is another system in Japan where people can speak each other with no eating, ‹i’ƒ“X.

ken (guest)

Read the OP more carefully. OP said ONE person (not 'people') of a (large) group would not be eating. Can't imagine any restaurant I've ever known over the past million years asking them to leave.

Seems even more ridiculous in this wonderful land where you can sit for 3 hours over a single coffee or read a full-length book or magazine in the local conbini without buying and nobody bats an eyelid.

"Seems even more ridiculous in this wonderful land where you can sit for 3 hours over a single coffee"
it is perfectly OK, if you are at ‹i’ƒ“X.
but it is perfectly ridiculous, if you order only a cup of coffee at restaurants in Japan, because the word, restaurant,ƒŒƒXƒgƒ‰ƒ“, means eating place, not drinking place.

�H“°,ƒŒƒXƒgƒ‰ƒ“,‹i’ƒ“X,‹�Žð‰®,ƒtƒ@�[ƒXƒgƒt�[ƒh,‰®‘ä are different.

in general, no meal ordering at restaurants is a bad manner.

Back to the original question, most restaurants in Japan as well as other countries let's you order one big dish and share it. You don't have to order a "full meal" for each person. At least I hardly do, unless it's a "tei-shoku-ya".

You know, OP was talking about lunchtime etiquette, and I can totally imagine a crowded lunch-hour restaurant not looking too kindly upon someone sitting there and not ordering lunch during the busiest hour of the day.

Many restaurants in central Tokyo will make a significant portion of their income for the day between 11:55am and 12:45pm, with customers waiting on line, grabbing a quick lunch, then leaving. They're literally losing money if someone occupies a seat without ordering.

OP was talking about lunchtime etiquette

She was? Okay, that can happen in office districts. Anyway, it's common to ask "ocha dake de iidesuka?" (Is it alright if we just have tea?) as we enter a restaurant to make sure what kind of a business they are running there at that time.

I've lived in Tokyo for years and many times one person in a group would just have a drink, and as long as everyone else in the group was eating it was fine. Maybe you should try family restaurants like Jonathans or Saizeria, and areas that aren't crowded?

Sometimes restaurants do have odd policies- the only time I think I walked out of a restaurant was because they had a mandatory one-drink order policy and I didn't want any of their drinks. I asked if it was okay to order an appetizer with my main dish instead, and they said no, a drink must be ordered. So I left. But this is the exception and not the rule.

Hello, OP here! Thanks so much for all the replies!

To clear some things up it was indeed lunchtime and the place we were at was packed with tourists and businessmen so perhaps that explains why my mother was asked to leave.

We took your advice and tried eating at a neon family restaurant and some cafes with more successful results. I also found that if I ordered two drinks there was much less fuss about it. Thank you so much for the help. Its good to know that that time was an isolated incident.

I found it interesting -and a bit frustrating haha- that in Japan they make a distinction between restaurants serving family meals and restaurants with individual orders, and further group those as requiring food orders than say, a cafe. Its quite easy to confuse one for the other and more intricate than i expected it to be. Thanks again!

in general, no meal ordering at restaurants is a bad manner.

Somebody better explain that to the hordes of people I would see just sitting around with their laptops out at various fast food restaurants (McDonalds, Lotteria, Mos Burger, etc.) So many times on my past trips I would stop in to get something quick to eat and there was almost no place to sit because of all the people not eating and just using the table space and the charging stations.

Those a fast food outlets. They function more like cafes and family restaurants. They are different from regular restaurants.