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proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/25 13:52
Hello, I'm a 21 year old girl from Spain and I met a Japanese guy online one year ago. We've been dating since we met and doing skype calls and all that, but we have never met in person because of his work, his fear of planes and many other reasons. We've really come a long way and developed a very close relationship, and we know we want to marry, so I now that I've become able to, I was thinking about going to Japan on a tourist visa and staying with him to see how we do living together and that stuff. My country requires me to apply for a permission before marrying him, and to have an interview with the Consul before obtaining it. I'd have to apply for the interview right before returning to my country, and then wait around 2 months, get permission and get married. After that I can apply for spouse visa.

However I am wondering, what kind of stuff could we be asked to show in order to prove that our marriage is out of love and not fake? He's 12 years older than me, and that worries me a bit. We've been talking on the phone and skype almost everyday for around one year, but I don't know how to prove that because I don't really have a register of all the calls, and I've changed my LINE account 2 times since last year, and regularly delete a lot of stuff from my devices including pictures he sends me on a daily basis and that stuff. I don't know if he has some of our first conversations but anyway I don't wanna show our private conversations to immigration lol so I can't really prove that we've been talking for a year. He hasn't sent me anything from Japan and I haven't sent him anything either because we don't really have anything we want to sent each other. I mean, letters and that stuff isn't really necessary to communicate nowadays...

He has no financial problems and has a stable job, but I don't really have any money since I've been studying. If we marry I think I'd be at home. We speak mainly in Japanese and sometimes English.

Does my relationship have any red flags ? I'm so afraid immigration will reject my spouse visa. I do want to live with him before getting engaged and asking for the permission, but on a tourist visa it'd be only 90 days , so the relationship's timeline is mostly online chatting and phone calls.... Will they believe us when we say we've met each other for more that one year? We could have met the other day and just be lying about it... so that worries me a lot.
Some help please!! Thanks.
by jenn (guest)  

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/25 17:39
I do see red flags on many levels.
Take one step at a time, and the first step should be meeting him. Go with a tourist visa.
by bsr (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/25 17:40
You're setting yourself up to be completely dependent on some bloke you've never met. Think again.
by Firas rate this post as useful

proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/25 18:13
In China,I Found Hundreds of Fake Love,if not Thousands.But I am 100% sure your Japanese partner love is not Fake.So Dont Be worry.In Japan,we Millions of Foreigners live with our Japanese spouse or partners.
you want to come Japan with 90 days tourist visa.You are more than welcome.
What Do you mean By "real marriage". Suppose our religion.Believe,Nationality may be Different.But Maximum time we Married only once in our whole Life time.Only Death can apart us.
90 Days is enough time to Marry your Japanese partner .Then you will apply for spouse visa.The whole world is beside you,if you intends to stay permanently with your Japanese partner.In Blink eye,Immigration
is powerful.But they have no such power,they will apart you from your Love one.
by Mike (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/25 18:14
Talking on the phone and skyping is not dating. As others have said, you really need to meet said person first and create a real bond.

It be doubtful you'd get a spouse visa. But you never know. But much easier to use tourist visa and do you proper first dates and trial living arrangement first.

Then if it works out, then look into further more concrete options.
by hakata14 (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/25 18:25
Step 1: meet him in person
Step 2: continue meeting each other often over the period of a year
Step 3: "move" to Japan (or him to Spain) and live together one year on a work visa, or if you can not get that, for 3 months on a tourist visa
Step 4: start thinking about marriage

Wish you all the best in your relationship, but slow down a bit, for your own sake. He may be married for all you know.
by 88Tim rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/25 23:52
Spain and Japan just signed a working holiday agreement, so you have a fairly easy way to go to Japan and date him in person (or he can come to Spain if he's not already over the age limit). If that goes well, then you can think about marriage. But both immigration and common sense would say that a marriage to someone you have never actually met isn't something they can give a visa for, there are too many red flags.
by Vita (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 01:31
You wasted a year with a stranger on the net...

Steps
0. Drop the closet human trafficker.
1. Finish school with a degree, with a work holiday or work visa.
2. Come to Japan on your own and find a job here.

I swear this international marriage scam trend must have been a reason the penpal thing got shut down.
by Gus (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 03:52
Hi. Thank you all for replying to my question ^^
I can't move to Japan on a work visa since I don't have a college degree (and won't get one). Working holiday might be an option, but then again it could be a red flag if I ask for spouse visa right after my w.h visa is finished. And only 200 w.h visas are given here in Spain this year so it's not certain I could get it.

Now regarding the reason we want to marry, that's personal. Every couple has their own views on marriage and as long as they really want to marry I don't see the problem. I don't have a doubt about him, have talked on skype with his mother, sister, friends... and he has with my mother. He did send me documents proving he's single and a lot of stuff. And anybody could be deceived by someone their dating in real life... It's not that you know the person that much better for going on several dates. So I'd like you to refrain from giving me your personal opinions about my relationship ^^
My initial question hasn't been answered. How can we proof we've been dating (because I feel like I'm dating him 😁) for one year? Will we be asked to show proof of personal conversations or something like that? I mean we have lots but those could be faked so, I don't know if they hold any real value as a proof. Maybe pictures of the proposal and the wedding day?
Thank you all!
by OP (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 04:06
And by the way I mentioned on my initial post that I DO plan on living with him for 3 months on a tourist visa. That was on my plan already. Of course I wanna see how it goes in person before marrying him. And I've clearly stated it before.
by OP (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 05:25
"It's not that you know the person that much better for going on several dates."
Except it is. For most us humans. I know from my own LDR what a huge difference it is to be together in person (can be both in a good or bad way). Maybe not for you (how would you know if you never met in person?), but you can already see how people on this forum think about it. Why do you think immigration thinks any different? What your idea of marriage is doesn't matter, it matters what theirs is.

In any case, during the 3 months you will be there, collect "proof" of your relationship that you can add to your chat histories.

Your best bet after tourist visa is WH. Start the application ASAP, I'd say. No, it is not a red flag if you apply for spouse right after WH, it happens more often I'd say (meeting someone while on WH), and immigration will be a lot more likely to accept your application in that case than now. Also, how about him coming to Spain? For a while maybe? Not an option?

Good luck and I hope he turns out to be what you were hoping for!
by 88Tim rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 05:47
Thank you for your answer.
Of course I will not marry under this forum's users or immigration beliefs of marriage. I will marry under my own. People go on dates and pretend to be someone they're not just to impress. Anyway, we'll have many dates once I'm there.
I don't know if I will get the WH visa but I'll try making the application.
He can't work here and as I presume you already know, Japanese people don't get that much free days at all. Coming to Spain to meet me means 20 hours flight so it is not that easy. He works a lot.
I wonder why immigration doesn't do interviews like Spain or USA. I wouldn't mind having them come to our house even in the middle of the night to see if we are living together. It really is much more difficult to prove our relationship only with 3 pictures and a few lines explaining it.
by OP (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 07:45
Red flags - hell yes.

But, if you do fly all the way to Japan - make sure you don't simply move in. Meet in a public place, make sure you have somewhere separate to stay. All of those basic safety precautions when meeting someone for the first time. Maybe it will all be fine and work out, or maybe not.

And yes bad things happen and people repeatedly fall for scams on the internet.
by JapanCustomTours rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 07:48
What you don't understand is that you will be completely dependent on him for many things, not least for staying in Japan in the first place. If you get into a big argument about something, or he just gets bored, or whatever, he can divorce and you'll have no choice but to go back to Spain. Or he can just threaten to do so, and blackmail you into submission or just make your life miserable, and there's nothing you can do about it.

It's not personal opinion, it's fact.
by Firas rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 07:48
Immigration isn't really there to sabotage any married couple that doesn't match their personal toughts about marriage. Their job is to sabotage FAKE marriages. A marriage between two stranges who marry in exchange for money and a visa and are not planing on living together as a married couple, or even meeting again. That's the evidence they're searching for. It doesn't really matter if you two haven't had much dates, or if you send each other a lot of presents or that kind of stuff. Every couple has their own ways and of course you can marry your partner based on those ways. As long as you two are a real couple and planning on living together as such, I think you'll be OK. Even if you have a big risk of divorce, falling out of love with each other, etc that's your problem not immigration's problem.
You should send pictures of your wedding day. If both families can be in them it would be much better. Pictures of the honeymoon are helpful as well. No one will have a proposal, wedding and honeymoon for a fake marriage with a stranger they're not really involved with. Weddings and rings are expensive and a good proof of your marriage. Also pictures you with his family and that stuff.
Don't make immigration think you two won't be a real couple and you'll be fine.

Best of luck.
by xIpq32 (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 12:22
I also have a slightly more optimistic view. One of my friends here had a relationship with a man online, then he flew here and on the day he landed, they married and got a spouse visa no problem at all. I don't know how much evidence they needed to submit, but the more substantial the better. Immigration don't care about your chat logs, their job is to determine that the relationship is legitimate, not to judge a couple on how cringey their texts to one another are. Skype, LINE, etc. are basically your entire relationship, the authorities will want to see them, so you should show whatever you have.

As has been said though, a degree of caution is required when meeting someone for the first time. Use common sense and take care of yourself. Book into a hotel for maybe the first week or so, and meet him a few times in this period. If you feel comfortable after that, then it's not for anyone here to judge how quickly you should move into his home.
by LIZ (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 14:54
Does my relationship have any red flags ?

FYI that question alone invites the opinions and beliefs of others, take responsibility for your actions online.

I don't wanna show our private conversations to immigration lol so I can't really prove that we've been talking for a year.

Speaking on experience, photocopies of letters, xmas cards, etc; while complicated were needed. Photos of you as a couple are usually the most important. If you do get that visa, and then decide to get permanent residency or naturalize into citizenship in the future, they will investigate you more thats how the government works with non-japanese.

Also in the questionnaire form your Japanese spouse receives, he will need to write details of how you met, how many times, when and where you met, how well you communicate and the like.

Getting married is the easy part, just prove you are legally married and thats it. Getting that spouse visa is a different ballpark.

Coming to Spain to meet me means 20 hours flight so it is not that easy. He works a lot.

Im from New York, I also had full time job but 20-22 hours for a round trip for a week is survivable. Japanese are known to take at least 5 days from work, depending on the job.
by Tony (guest) rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 15:16
I can completely understand he's busy, but since he has no financial problems, a visit to Spain around new year, during golden week or in the summer holiday should be possible, right? He should care about you enough to make time for that, since you want to get married.

And some good points were raised concerning safety and dependence. Please keep in mind what could happen in the worst case and prepare for it accordingly. Call me old-fashioned, but in a situation like yours I feel it is a lot safer if he makes the first trip to meet, rather than you. Will give you another opportunity to gather evidence (photos with your family, etc.).
by 88Tim rate this post as useful

Re: proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/26 16:11
Thanks everybody for the advice.
The real reason we don't meet is because we've never really feel there's a need, I mean we know someday we'll meet and be together so things can wait. I'm studying most of the time (I've finally finished this month), last golden week he was supposed to come but I was sick in hospital and last christmas I lost a family member and overall I have pretty serious family issues so sometimes having him come here for only 3 or 4 days and being sick or in the middle of a family fight, doesn't sound that well so I just have him support me from Japan. Also he has so much fear of planes he gets sick on the airplane. So the fact that we haven't meet is just.... circumstantial.

I'll try to gather as much stuff as possible, even though I've never thought really a few letters could be so important to prove anything (I mean, the letter could have been written last week or by another person, any pictures I show them could be from yesterday). I would only trust wedding pictures if I was an immigration officer but who knows, will get everything just in case.
Thank you!
by OP (guest) rate this post as useful

proof of real marriage for visa 2017/8/27 19:50
Last christmas I lost my family member:
Its your Life.Go Ahead with whatever you want.Wish you Best of Luck.
If your Family lost its member,then they will need you more than ever.You can help them Mentally.You can help them physically or economically.In this critical situation,Only a selfish can make a pleasure trip to Japan and Always Thinking Marrying a strangers.
You cant apply for work visa,Because you have not finish your Graduation Yet.So it is the best Decision,If your partner wait until your Bachelor or Master Degree.At the same time,you will focus on your career.
when you are Economically solvent,then You will take your Final Decision on Marriage.
Already Firas san give you clear idea on real world.If you blind on this,then when your eye will open,you will
crying tremendously.
by Den (guest) rate this post as useful

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