Want to studying in Japan, clueless

I'm a complete moron when it comes to stuff like this, so please forgive me if I ask stupid questions. Also, for this reason, don't be a afraid to patronise. ;) Priority for me is understanding.

I'm 19, live in England, currently not in college, no qualifications (bar a few GCSEs) and don't have much money.

I basically want to know (with my situation in mind) what's the fastest, cheapest way to go study in Japan?

Absolutely clueless. I keep hearing about Japan exchanges through colleges/universities but I have no idea how to get started with that. Do I have to get qualifications before I can get going with this? Or can those be gained after I go to Japan and study?

Also, how long should the process take? Do I just bop on down to my local college, apply for some course that has a Japan exchange programme, choose that, drop a sack of money to pay for everything?

Somehow I doubt it's going to be that easy. :(

Thanks!

What (subject) and why do you want to study in Japan? :)

I think that without your A-levels, the chances are slim to nothing. Try and enrol in a college and complete your two years. Then you may have a chance.