Why he doesn’t call me sensei?

I teach at a school & most of the students call me by my first name & sensei (my last name is too long so I've only used my first name).

Most do call me sensei & a few called me chan until I told them that I'm their teacher & they should act accordingly.

One kid calls me only by my first name (no sensei, chan, san, whatever). I don't think he's being rude, but I'm just wondering why he's always done that.

What would be a good way to ask why he doesn't use any honorifics with me? I don't want to offend him & I don't necessarily want him to start calling me sensei either...

What would be a good way to ask why he doesn't use any honorifics with me? I don't want to offend him & I don't necessarily want him to start calling me sensei either...

My question for you is what do you want him to call you? Personally if I ask all the students to call me by my first name plus "sensei", I would stick to that. You could tell him to call you the same way as other students call you. As a mom I think a good way to ask young people a question is when the situation is neutral and you are not focusing on the question, like driving in the car, walking to some place, and so on. Ask only once and let him to the talking.

Maxxx,

You say they are "kids." I think it's universal to have a kid or two in class who doesn't call their teacher properly. Indeed, they may be "shy" rather than "rude," but when I was a kid these students were viewed by their teacher as being "rude." Anyway, there's nothing surprising about that. Teenagers and children don't know what they are doing even if they want to stop.

The teachers in the U.S. where I used to go to grade school would calmly correct them with a smile.

Example;
Student: "Hey, teacher, I know the answer."
Teacher: "It's Mrs. Smith."

The student, then, might or might not pay attention, but the teachers I know didn't exactly repeat her/his word. They'd just keep their patience and correct them again at another time if the same thing happens.

The way you correct them would be slightly different when speaking in Japanese, but in English, the above dialog seems to be suitable, at least in my perspective.

Of course, I totally agree with Ikuyo Kuruyo's "driving in the car, walking to some place" thing, but unless you're a Physical Education teacher or a homeroom teacher, it might be difficult to find a "neutral" situation between you and the class, although you can always try to do that when you spot the student walking down the hallway.

Are you an ALT or language school teacher? Are you foreign? If so the kid probably doesn't think you're a real teacher and/or doesn't like you. If you are an ALT you need to accept not all people will respect you. Just be glad it isn't another teacher.

Thank you for your responses, Ikuyo, Uco, & Junc.

@Ikuyo
That's a good idea to ask him during a neutral situation. I'll try doing that. I usually ask him to bring the books or other teaching materials with me to the staff room after clas ends, so I think I'll ask him when we do that.

@Uco
Thanks for your input. Yes, I know that he's not being rude. I'm not a P.E. teacher or a homeroom teacher, but I have a lot of chances to talk to him because he usually says something to me in the hallway even if I'm not teaching his class that day.

@Junc
Yes, I'm an ALT & I'm foreign, but I think that your thinking is a little off...
I know that he likes me as a person because he usually goes out of his way to talk to me outside of class & he even gave me his old keychain, but I'm not sure if he likes me as a teacher.
I asked him how his classes were this semester & he said that they were boring, but when I asked him why mine was boring he said that it's because I didn't talk much (since the main teacher basically wanted the students to work on an essay).

Well, anyway, I'm grateful for your replies.
I think I know why he doesn't call me "sensei," but I'm still thinking of how to approach him about it.

If he talks to you a lot he probably sees you more as a friend. Why does it insult you so much that he doesn't call you sensei? You're not a real teacher anyway. If you call him out it will only damage your reputation.

Is he speaking to you in English outside of class? If he is confident enough to do that, he is probably trying to speak natural English and address you how it is appropriate in English. He is probably proud of himself and trying to address you naturally. If not, still he is getting a friendly vibe and trusts you enough to approach you.
At any rate, if you correct him outside of class, he might get the "I'm an authority figure" vibe and not feel as comfortable around you.
I have taught English here too, and first names for foreigners are pretty common. Unless he is the ONLY one who will not call you sensei and the other students feel it is favoritism, I would not push the issue. You did mention to the whole class to address you correctly. If it really bothers you and is a constant problem, I would continue to correct all students during the class in the manner like Uco said.
You should be glad they are asking questions during class, the last English class I taught here (albeit adults) I had to call on students by name just to get a peep out of them. :)

If he talks to you a lot he probably sees you more as a friend. Why does it insult you so much that he doesn't call you sensei? You're not a real teacher anyway. If you call him out it will only damage your reputation.

What kind of strange thinking is that? He's not a real teacher is he? He's an Assistant Language Teacher, so he's very much a teacher! And there's nothing wrong with a little respect to someone who's older than you (the student).

If the OP still finds this confusing, I would suggest talking to the English teacher or homeroom teacher. Tell that person to ask the student to address you with sensei. That way it won't feel too confrontational.

Sorry tan3, but the day an ALT actually does something remotely teacher-like I will change my opinion. I've been one long enough in the past myself to know it isn't real teaching and that ALTs are the butt of the Japanese education system.

This guy should just be happy his kids speak to him and want to engage in class even a little. If he starts getting picky over what they call him, then all he's going to do is scare whatever enjoyment he's giving them out of their classes and they'll fall back into the usual Japanese classroom and social style of zero-engagement. The guy has obviously made a good impression as someone the kids felt they could talk to on an equal level. This is about as good as it gets, when you consider the way most kids, teachers and parents usually view ALTs.

Sorry tan3, but the day an ALT actually does something remotely teacher-like I will change my opinion. I've been one long enough in the past myself to know it isn't real teaching and that ALTs are the butt of the Japanese education system.

So you're saying that someone who is standing in a classroom in front of kids, even if it's an ALT, should not demand a little respect from them?

This guy should just be happy his kids speak to him and want to engage in class even a little. If he starts getting picky over what they call him, then all he's going to do is scare whatever enjoyment he's giving them out of their classes and they'll fall back into the usual Japanese classroom and social style of zero-engagement. The guy has obviously made a good impression as someone the kids felt they could talk to on an equal level. This is about as good as it gets, when you consider the way most kids, teachers and parents usually view ALTs.

You must not have enjoyed being an ALT then huh. He should be happy they speak to him? Whatever man. He is still older than them, and in some position of authority, so it's only normal to respect someone who is older than you. By the way, the OP never mentioned the kids weren't talking to him, he was only talking about one kid who didn't address him with sensei, so you're getting slightly off topic. Anyway, if it's making the teacher uncomfortable, then he should address the issue. I also don't understand why politely but firmly telling a kid he should address the ALT with sensei would in any way destroy the harmony there is between the two.

I have to say that I agree with Tan3 about demanding a little respect from students. At least I was never the parent who "view ALTs" in any other way.

All teachers have a great risk of being treated unrespectfully anyway, especially by low teen students but even by high teen students. It's a challenge to the teachers, I'm sure, but that doesn't mean that teachers (incluging Assistant Language Teachers) can't try to get them call them "sensei."

But I do think that the OP should deal with the student directly. The student in topic does seem to think of the OP as a friend. A friend would talk to friends directly, not through other teachers.

By the way, I don't think the OP ever said (s)he thought the student was insulting either. Quite the contrary.

tan3: I loved being an ALT. But I accepted very quickly that I was not a teacher and I should not expect the same level of respect as a normal teacher. This was what made me very successful as an ALT, because my kids knew I could help them with English, but they also knew they could take to me on a level playing field (which explains why I get dozens of Christmas and Birthday cards from Japan every year and am still in touch with former student, some of whom are now University graduates).

Of course students should be respectful to older people, but at the same time, as a foreigner whose job is to open up students horizons about foreign cultures and get kids to feel comfortable about speaking to foreigners, why should I go out of my way to upset students by demanding they call me sensei? What good is that to them and their fear of communicating in English and with foreigners? You do realise that an ALTs job is to a) assist with teaching in the classroom, b) expose students to foreign culture, c) improve student communication (not just in English). Anyone that has worked in the industry knows that a is meaningless, while b and c is what you're really there to do.

The OP mentioned that this student talked to him a lot and that students in his classes generally engaged well. From years of experience in the field and from knowing hundreds of other ALTs, this is a rare thing. He should be happy the students don't just ignore him, which happens in most cases.

Uco: you may respect ALTs, but this is not necessarily common throughout Japan. I've lived in places where people have been welcoming, but I've also lived in places where I've been treated like a sore thumb, an annoying burden forced onto a school by the local BoE.

Anyone who teaches is a teacher. Certification makes them a professional teacher. But saying otherwise is like saying only someone who fishes with a commercial license is really fishing. If I am hired to tutor someone then I'm their teacher for the hours they are with me. But all that aside, when someone is in a position of authority, they deserve respect. The student can't claim to not notice that everyone else refers to the OP as sensei, so it's a deliberate act. That's disrespectful.

Kelly, that kind of narrow minded thinking will do no good for Japanese students. The ALT is the one adult figure in a school that kids are meant to have a level social connection with. By taking on the mantle of the usual position of authority, the ALT is not achieving their function.

I'm sure the boy in question calls all the real teachers in his school sensei, because this is built in to Japanese society as a norm. The fact this lad is comfortable speaking to his ALT on a first-name basis should be celebrated, not dismissed as disrespectful. Clearly you're another person that doesn't understand the purpose of the ALT programme in wider Japanese society.

Out of interest, do you put kun after the boy's name when you speak to him?
If not, perhaps you could model the behavior you expect.

In Kelly's defense, that IS the exact same mentality Japanese people who complain about JET use as an argument for why JET is a waste of money... so, she's not alone in the very least, but yeah...

Hmm wrote;
"but I've also lived in places where I've been treated like a sore thumb, an annoying burden forced onto a school by the local BoE."

Treated so even compared to all the other teachers? Okay.

If you're a foreign teacher, it's entirely possible the student might be unsure how to address you. It's quite common for many students to be embarrassed with how to address a foreign teacher. Do I say 'sensei'? Do I say 'teacher'? Do I use their first name? Do I use their last name? What it considered polite in their country?

I know many of my students downright refuse to call me by my first name because they're concerned it will offend me, even though I've told them it's perfectly ok. ^^

My experience...many years ago---with assistant teachers was that they were mentoring us and therefore were a bit like an older buddy....

A bit of background...in my country our teachers had something like 60 students...so they would come in, give their lecture then leave. They did ask or answers a few questions but a few only.

The class room was divided in sections, each one with an assistant. He would hand out assignments and collect them when due.

After class we could talk to him and ask for explanations.
We weren't on a first basis as in my country student over 10-12 call one another by their family name, so we called him by his family name too ..

Teachers of course were called Mr. X
or Madam Y.

I'm in my 20's so it wasn't too long ago i was at school. Here in the UK at my school at least we had a French language assistant who would spend a couple of hours each week with 4-5 of the French students at a time outside of normal classes. It was a formally scheduled class and while he was the only teacher in charge, his title was still ALT. We used to however call him by his first name and the classes were fairly informal yet neither he nor us as students felt we were showing him a lack of respect. We respected him as an educator and in fact the informal and fun atmosphere actually helped us to learn and absorb material faster. The thing is while traditionally calling a teacher by their first name is considered disrespectful, nowadays (as long as the teacher is fine with it) I would see it as part of an informal atmosphere that helps to keep things, relaxed and fun makes it easier to learn. I agree that this sort of atmosphere is the best to learn in however i also consider and respect ALTs as proper teachers too- I never considered my ALT French teacher to be anything other than a teacher when i was a student even if I did call him by his first name. In a few months i will be working as an ALT in Japan and honestly I do not mind if students call me by my first name- the real respect I will expect from them is behaving in class, doing their best to listen to me and doing their work. Which of my names they choose to use is insignificant for me, as long as they are being respectful by behaving and learning to be best of their ability.