Keeping kidsf English moving to Japan

Ifm an American while my wife is Japanese. I lived in Japan for most of the last decade, where we met and started our family, before relocating to the US two years ago for my work.

I was recently offered a job in Hiroshima, where my wifefs from, so wefre considering moving back. Itfs a career position, so this could be (hopefully) a very long term move.

A major reservation we have though is our kidsf ability to hold both languages. My wife especially worries the kids will forget English if we move back (they were born in Japan and still prefer speaking in Japanese, so English has always lagged to begin with). My oldest is starting elementary school (1st grade). One option is international school, but Ifd prefer to avoid that due to location and cost not being optimal for where wefd be.

Has anyone had experience with this and could give me some insight? Obviously therefs plenty of Japanese who know English (Ifm married to one), so I know itfs possible to gain and maintain second language proficiency (I do also), but anyone have kids who went to local public/private schools and maintained both languages, or conversely ran into problems with this? Thanks!

I speak Japanese and English fluently, so does a cousin of mine, we're both from all-Japanese families, we lived in the U.S. a few years in our childhood, I know that a lot of parents "worry the kids will forget English", and I don't know why they worry.

So, could you share us your concern about what the problem is if they should forget English? Are you worried that they won't be able to communicate with their English-speaking parent that they're being able to communicate now? Then I don't think you need to worry. Are you worried they'd suffer when the parents decide to take them back to the U.S. again? I wouldn't worry about that either, but you do need to be prepared that one of your kids or all your kids would want to stay in Japan. But that usually has little to do with language. What level of language ability are you looking at anyway?

I hope to help you if I can.

Your kids seem to be at a unique age which could possibly be advantageous. If you are not moving to Japan for good, this may be your kids best chance to learn fluent Japanese which will give them opportunities them might not have had otherwise.

Your child's English language ability will suffer even at an International school (there are not many good ones near Hiroshima, the closest best one is Canadian Academy Kobe and Osaka Senri) but it should be coming off a reasonable base.

If you keep up their academic reading and writing, then it should be ok. I like to flip the idea. How much will their Japanese improve?

I see real problems when they get into middle school around Year 7 when they will need to choose between an English or Japanese educational system.

I can answer educational questions but a parent in the same position can answer other questions that I cant

If your children are as young as one just starting elementary school and the other one younger, I tend to think that it is important that they first build their gthinkingh capability in a language they feel comfortable with, which is likely to be Japanese from what you describe. In the process they gmighth forget English for a while, as they will be away from it, but getting their first language and thinking capability established might take priority IMHO.

I know of a somewhat "opposite" case: I have been helping a non-Japanese family living in Tokyo (not native speakers of English either, so the parents speak in their language most of the time at home, and might watch TV/internet program in English and their language), and the child who started at a local elementary school is developing her Japanese language skills quite fast, while not losing her mother tongue, not losing English (through YouTube and other internet resources, as well as short chats with someone like me in English too, though I try to keep it Japanese). That child is going to an additional Japanese language course, and the teacher there said it is important at that age that the child establishes their language capability in expressing their emotions, thoughts, etc., in one main language. Other(s) will follow as the child grows and deepens their interest in another language.

In your case, in addition to the local elementary school, maybe you could find an international cultural exchange group locally, where all of you can go together on the weekends/evenings for talks in different languages, just as an idea.

I know people who have spent their early childhood in the US and returned – one of my classmates was in the US during her 3, 4, 5th grades in elementary school, she kept her English alright after the family returned to Japan, but her younger siblings forgot it, as they were only preschoolers when they lived in the US. And Ifm talking about pre-internet era.

I myself grew up in Japan till 7th grade, then spent 8 and 9th grades in the States due to my fatherfs work (went to local public schools there, no Japanese school available at the time), got back into Japanese senior high upon return. I have not lost my gEnglish language earh so to say, so my pronunciation is mainly American. People develop their language skills differently and have different interests.

Thanks for the insight so far! You all bring up some very good points.

This could very well be a permanent move for us, and I think our biggest concern is my kids lose the ability to communicate with our English speaking relatives, and also they might struggle were they to return to American schooling or work (really thinking post-high school there).

My wife is more concerned than I am, honestly. In response to one poster: youfre right, I communicate with them just fine (though I can use Japanese comfortably at home, so that probably helps), but extended family wefre more worried about (that said, they seem to handle them just fine now, like you said).

You bring up a point Ifve heard often, which is 7th grade onward they may elect to remain in Japanese school. Thatfs fine by me: I want them to be where theyfre comfortable, and if thatfs Japan then great.

As for higher ed, my wife draws from a British friend of ours whofs kids struggled in the UK Uni/work culture after growing up in Japan. I feel American culture is so diverse and decentralized though thatfs not as big an issue as in the UK/Europe. I went to university and worked with many non-native English speakers and it never seemed to be much of a problem. Conversely, I feel the Japanese system would be much less open to people who arenft well versed in it. Someone please correct me if they see otherwise or have an alternative POV.

Just building on what is said above.

Something that I've noticed (as a trend) is that giving your kids the ability to read casually in English by middle primary school will give them a great advantage.

I've found that students find it easier to learn English (reading/writing) than Japanese just due to the alphabet.

I'm pretty sure I'm correct on this - but primary school in Japan significantly involves students learning the basic alphabet to function as an adult in Japan. Hirogana and the English alphabet can be learnt reasonably quickly - the same cannot be said for kanji....

Thanks for the feedback.

One thing you can do is to let your kids attend eikaiwa lessons. I'm sure they'll keep up their English fine enough by communicating with their parents, but if you are concerned, leaving it to professionals could be a good option. Just make sure they enjoy it, because if they don't, it can make things worse. Then, they'll start learning English at school soon enough.

Video chat is also a handy tool in the world today. But again, it's no use for parents to force or even urge it to their children. It's not even worth it. They need to want to do it on their own. And even if they don't, that is that, and there still will be a great future for them. It may not be the future that the parents predicted, but it's still a great one.

For the record, I'm from an all-Japanese family and I left Japan at the end of Japanese 1st grade and enrolled in 2nd grade in the U.S. where I stayed for 4.5 years. Of course, my Japanese became rusty and I was behind on my Japanese education, but I had no problem communicating with Japanese relatives in terms of language ability. What you say to relatives is very basic, you know.

What you can keep in mind, however, is that language is an extremely tiny part of communication. Once you part with cousins, you tend to grow out of them anyway. You see them after years, and things will not be the same. But that's not because of the language barrier. It's because you now have less things in common. That's how teenagers work.

And then you might decide to get higher education or earn a career, and you suddenly realize that you don't speak the language as good as your peers, but that's not because you got rusty. It's because you only spoke as a kid in the first place.

As you become a real adult, you realize that you can communicate with anybody if you try, and you find out how you can. And by realizing that you only spoke as a kid, you can start fresh to speak like an adult and to build up your career.

Pronunciation and the grammar you once earned by nature will be a plus. But the illusion of thinking you spoke better or the lack of confidence that comes from thinking you forgot will be a minus.

Bottom line: You can't predict the future. There are always negative sides and positive side to life. What is negative to one person may not be negative to another person, but everyone equally has negatives and positives.

Another thing: Maybe language is not the only thing your wife is worried about. Whether she is aware of it or not, changing your lifestyle is a huge thing, and you tend to worry about a lot of unnecessary things. Moreover, once she is in Hiroshima, she would naturally be more of a host with huge responsibilities whereas she was more of a newcomer in the U.S. Maybe she just needs a hug.

Definitely check out:

Bilingualmonkeys.com

And its forum:

Bilingualzoo.com

The founder, Adam Beck, from California, also lives in Hiroshima with his Japanese wife and 2 kids. He is outstandingly helpful and did an amazing job raising his children while at the same time helping so many people around the world. His kids attended the Japanese public school system. Maybe you could even connect up with him in Hiroshima!

Sorry, a correction to my above post:

Adam Beck, founder of Bilingualmonkeys.com grew up in Illinois but attended graduate school in California.