Gay couple looking for safe place to stay

Firstly, I've had a look and seen some answers to this question - but from several years back. I was hoping to have an updated opinion on the situation and hope that things have changed only for the better.

I've been to Japan a few times but I've only ever gone with women/other couples so haven't had to query this issue before. This time around I'm taking my partner, who is also a guy.

The issue is accommodation. It's my understanding Japan is no longer legally allowed to discriminate, but those familiar with the community know this isn't always upheld and police often don't intervene. I'd like us to stay somewhere safe and have been browsing on booking sites to see what there is.

There's some real good places at reasonable prices but only with the one bed, which eliminates the "sleeping separately" excuse. I've contacted a few and while waiting for the responses thought to ask here if anyone has recent experience of staying in hotels or rentals as a gay couple, primarily in the Tokyo area.

Thanks in advance for the help

For decades I - a man - have been sharing rooms with male friends and business friends in Japan in all kind of lodging types, and I have never ever had any problems with any lodgings. They are generally not interested in the sexual orientation of their guests and have no problems with people of the same sex sharing rooms.

+1 to what is written above. Just stating in regular hotels won't be an issue.

Never encountered this as an issue when doing bookings across Japan for my clients. And, Japan is an incredibly safe country.

This site was introduced in the Gay & Lesbian Traveler column of Lonely Planet's Kyoto edition.
The hotel introduction on this site may be helpful.
https://www.utopia-asia.com/accjapn.htm

I will be frank about it.

A business hotel would never ask for/or be interested in why you are accompanied by another man even if the bed in the room is a "small double bed". I was also traveling with a group of friends, and I slept in the same bed with my male friend at over 14 different accommodations.
They do have an issue or be slightly on the lookout, at some hotels for PDA, regardless of the sex orientation. I did see once a couple being declined a room as they were a bit over the top with the PDA, but it was in Takayama which has a very "rural mentality", and they were concerned about the other guests.
So at regular hotels, in smaller cities or villages, only PDA might (extremely rare) be an issue.

The only place where you might get turned away as a gay couple, are love hotels. But I would avoid those anyway as they are not very clean or pleasant to stay at.

Wasn’t there some flap years ago (more than just “several”) about one of the major Japanese business hotel chains having a rule about not allowing two males to share a double room? I swear I am not imagining this, although I can’t remember the details. (I think maybe a twin room was okay but not a double.) It was maybe back in the 1990s, but I do have a distinct recollection of something like this being stated on a hotel’s web site (so it was after the Internet began to be used for hotel booking, but in the early days). Am I crazy or something? Obviously, that rule is no longer on the books. Just wondering; the posts here sort of make it sound like this sort of thing never happened.

Yeah I can remember that being discussed while I've been participating on this site, which would be within the last 15 years (and I would have guessed within the last 6 or so) but I cant remember the specifics. Maybe it was this? https://www.japan-guide.com/forum/quereadisplay.html?0+45102

To Kim, Lazy Pious,

I distinctly remember that too - and also even about writing to that hotel to let them know that THAT kind of policy would not be appreciated. I will see if I can dig up that old email, I know i used one of my web-based e-mail accounts for that… It was not about love hotels, but a business hotel.

To OP,
But as the earlier posters said, i have not heard of any issues with 2 males sharing a twin (meaning two beds) room at all. Business travellers, not couples, do that too.

To Kim, Lazy Pious,

I distinctly remember that too - and also even about writing to that hotel to let them know that THAT kind of policy would not be appreciated. I will see if I can dig up that old email, I know i used one of my web-based e-mail accounts for that… It was not about love hotels, but a business hotel.

To OP,
But as the earlier posters said, i have not heard of any issues with 2 males sharing a twin (meaning two beds) room at all. Business travellers, not couples, do that too.

although no one does not indicate, even after married, it is quite normal that the couple uses individual bed (or futon) in their home in Japan. so that, hotel rooms are designed to fit to the majority of their customers, Japanese.

It is unnecessary to tell hotels the relationship status of another adult that you are traveling with.

It is very common in Japan for male friends to travel together. I've stayed with other males in hotels and ryokan and never even thought about what the staff thought nor were we ever questioned. The idea of there being a "safety concern" for two men traveling together for that reason sounds crazy.

I have traveled all over Japan numerous times, stayed in ryokans, minshuku, hotels etc and not once did my sexual orientation or my relationship with my same sex partner come up.