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Okoden to work colleague 2023/2/28 12:32
We would like to mail from the US okoden to a work colleague who lost both parents. We are not sure whether or not the colleague will hold a funeral service or not. One parent was born in Japan and the other was born in the US. They both passed away in the US.
How much okoden should we send?
by susan007  

Re: Okoden to work colleague 2023/3/2 11:09
So I understand that this is a Japanese family who have lived in the US for many years and you are in the US too.

Considering it is your work colleague and not a close friend (and also considering the possibility that that person might not be of a full Japanese upbringing, fully familiar with the customs and practices?), i might suggest $100.

For a work colleague or a neighbor I would give 5,000 yen. (I am Japanese living in Japan and in my 50s, meaning no youth)

For reference, for a good friend (of many years)’s parent’s passing, I usually give 10,000 yen.
by AK rate this post as useful

Re: Okoden to work colleague 2023/3/2 21:10
If you understand some Japanese, you can Google 御香典 相場 to see average amounts in general. And it also depends on the age range of the sender.

For example the website below suggests that, for a family member of a colleague, it's generally 3,000-5,000 yen if the sender is in the person's 20s; 3,000-10,000 yen if the sender is 30-49; and 10,000 yen if the sender is 50-69 years old. You may want to multiply that by the number of senders, while avoiding even numbers like 2,000 or 6,000 and so on.
https://www.famille-kazokusou.com/magazine/manner/134

Also note that depending on the timing and religion (such as Christianity), you shouldn't use the word "o-koden", but something like "go-reizen" instead.

Meanwhile, be sure to wait for a while until your colleague hopefully sends out a message about having a funeral or not. In recent years, quite a few people have started to avoid the custom of gift money (as well as flowers and gifts of all kind), to make things simple at a time of grief and confusion. If they want to avoid them, they'll clarify that in their notice.
by Uco rate this post as useful

Re: Okoden to work colleague 2023/3/4 03:46
Thank you very much for your replies and the web link. Very helpful. Arigato gozaimashita!
by susan007 rate this post as useful

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