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What are Seme-Uke Relationships? 2005/7/3 15:43
I've read and heard about male-male relationships in Japan refered to as Seme and Uke. One is the taller/older top and the other is the smaller/younger bottom? Are all gay relationships in Japan based on this or is there an equal middleground for some? How are these two variations made apparent when meeting someone for the first time?

Curious. :3
Thanks in advance.
by Joey  

yaoi 2005/7/5 21:35
well ehm....i don't know much about the gay scene ( i ain't gay and i'm not even a guy ^^; ) but i am crazy about yaoi ( gay manga's) what i often see in those manga's is that there is actually always one uke and one seme. but there are a few manga's out there who have two guys in them who are on equal level. i think it is possible in japan that guys are equal to each other in a relationship...however...i am not to sure since most of these manga's are being written and drawn by women ^^;
by bluemonika rate this post as useful

Hm...(Mildly Off-topic) 2005/8/6 13:51
Wow...now that you mentioned it. That's true. Like Saiga and Kakei from Legal Drug. Hm... Weird. I'll have to kidnap me some bishies when I go. ^.^

by Jessie rate this post as useful

The ANSWERS! 2005/9/1 08:23
A seme is the usually the one who tops, or is more aggressive in the relationship. An uke is the one who bottoms, and they're usually much more affectionate towards the other.
by Hezzer rate this post as useful

Seme/Uke 2005/12/14 04:26
Seme and uke are a term for yaoi readers to describe the top person and bottom person, or the more dominant, submissive. (Seme-top, uke-bottom) This does NOT however describe Japanese gay relationships. Don't think all relationships in Japanese involved seme/uke type standards. In real life, gays are much more flexible.
by Keiri rate this post as useful

Seme/Uke 2005/12/16 09:43
I believe they are abbreviations derived from Semeru-To attack
Ukeru(?)-To receive
by Philip rate this post as useful

I agree 2006/6/21 07:56
yo i agree with the yaoi chick ummmm.... i am a big fan of yaoi and in most of the ones i have read there is a seme and a uke but i have read two manga in which the men were equal there names are Yellow and Fake. then again i could be wrong cause i am not gay and i am a girl he he he :)
by Yaoi fan rate this post as useful

Yaoi.~ 2006/7/11 06:08
To start out with Seme and Uke are generally referring to the position of sex had in a yaoi (male-on-male) manga, or anime. Seme meaning the one who is on top, and Uke being the one on the bottom. Seme and Uke can also be referred to personalities (in a male-on-male relationship). Seme would usually be the more aggressive one, possibly older, and manlier, though that isn't always the case. The Uke is usually the smaller, daintier, younger, or sweeter one. Though, sometimes, Seme and Uke are only used in referral to the age of the two mates.
I know a bit about this considering I am a male, and I am gay. :/
If you are looking for a good Seme-Uke relationship there are a few mangas: Empty Heart and Wild Rock are definitely two of the best.
If you're looking for a neutral relationship read any Death Note doujinshis which, if you're lucky enough, you'll find English translations to.

by Edward rate this post as useful

Duh 2006/7/12 18:18
Don't you guys know that Wikipedia has everything?!
by Psshh rate this post as useful

Seme~Uke 2007/3/27 03:24
Well I have read many yaoi manga's. Seme would be more of the dominate type, a guardian and more masculne of the two in the relationship. Uke is more submissive, gentle, and femimine.
by Mew Mew Chan rate this post as useful

top and bottom? 2007/4/26 10:32
Been trying to figure out what seme and uke means for some time now and I think you described it pretty well.

I do get a little annoyed when people refer to it as top and bottom, as I cannot see how that has any relevance as to who is doing what.

To me give/recieve explains it better.

As a girl I wouldn't know ofcourse, but.. Am I wrong?
by yet another yaoi fan rate this post as useful

Neko or Tachi? 2007/4/26 12:23
I'm a girl, but I've a gay friend here in Japan. He's also a foreigner and he got a pretty culture shock here, since he's always asked if he's ''neko or tachi'' ( that's similar to uke and seme, neko-bottom, tachi-top ) and when he answers ''I'm both.'' people say: ''How? You cannot be both!''
Since I'm also a yaoi fan I was always wondering if all that yaoi manga mirror the reality or not ( actually I didn't like this aggressive/submissive idea so much...I mean, in a manga it's entertaining, but in reality it would remind me too much of the conservative idea of a male/female relationship ) . But as my friend found out not all gay guys here are like that. And now he has a boyfriend here ( not his first one...*g* My friend was disappearing in Shinjuku Nichome for days...but imagine how popular a blond guy is in Japan^.^!!!) ...that means he's together with that guy for some months already.
by Nyan rate this post as useful

??? 2007/5/1 06:52
Why is everyone talking about manga relationships when he asked about real life relationships?

by Rai-chan rate this post as useful

About that 2007/5/13 05:42
I'm a guy, I'm gay, I have a boyfriend. In a lot of ways described on here my boyfriend would be the seme and I'd be uke.
But like one person said, every relationship can differ. He's the older, masculine guardian, and I'm the younger, dainty, feminine one. But personality-wise, I pretty much run the relationship.
So it all depends on the guys being spoken of.
by Jer rate this post as useful

Stereotypically... 2007/6/4 17:28
Seme/Uke is more a term for yaoi(gay) manga or anime as far as I know. And the seme is stereotypically taller (FAKE is about two guys the same height trying to work out who's seme ^^;) and usually older. Of-course, it can be the other way round intentionally - for instance, making a student seme to a teacher gives the humiliation factor that the teacher's uke to someone younger than him.
But the seme is almost always the more dominant one, with the uke being more feminine.
by Lie rate this post as useful

seme-uke relationships 2007/6/12 15:00
actually though youre all probably correct in some way, seme and uke do not refer only to gay men. they also refer to yuri(female-female) relationships even though its not as common. im bi and i love both yuri and yaoi and so many of my friends are either into yaoi or are gay, so i know somewhat. to add on to what the others were saying, seme is dominant and uke is more timid and "the underdog". hope i helped somehow :P :) -have a happy day-
by kimi rate this post as useful

the female fantasy 2007/7/8 03:33
I think the Seme-uke stereotype is most common in yaoi manga and does not necessarily reflect the reality of gays in Japan. I believe it is simply the way women mangakas prefer to illustrate gay relationships. It is an easier and pehaps ''cuter'' or ''sexier'' concept for girls =) If the characters are equal or both seme/uke, it is harder to create distinct personalities and predictabilities or twists in behavior.
by Hoshino rate this post as useful

Yaoi, comment on Lie's entry... 2007/7/15 08:47
I enjoy Yaoi too *^_^* and a good example of the teacher/submissive student/dominant theme would be in "Passion", published in English by June Manga
by kodama rate this post as useful

Yay Yaoi! 2007/9/26 02:04
Uke and Seme are like yuki and shuichi off gravitation! That's how I got it explained to me a long time ago. I have been called an Uke many times and haven't yet decided whether that is good or bad. Since I am neither homosexual or straight[I don't know what I am]. Oh and if you don't know of shuichi and yuki you better get reading...or watching the anime and manga are awsome! x
by Cloud-x rate this post as useful

experience 2007/9/30 12:17
im gay and i have a boyfriend. normally i would be the uke because thats where i feel at home but for my boyfriend i moved to the seme role because hes not comfortable being the seme. i love him that much. but im also told that im a passive seme so whatever. but my point is that it depends on the couple.
by Kiyoshi rate this post as useful

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