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Ancient Japanese Wedding Engagement 2007/8/31 12:23
Okay, I feel very stupid for asking this but, how did the Ancient Japanese (around 1300's and 1400's) ask for marriage? I know there's stuff about the family as a go between, but what else was used? Did they give something to the woman of interest? (I also know engagement rings weren't used) or did they just ask and she just accepted? I've been trying to look up things and find myself in dead ends. Help!
by Kami no Aijin  

Engagement ceremony and possibilities. 2007/12/24 11:12
Looking up one website, they say that they do the "yunimo" ceremony where the bride and groom exchange packages wrapped in rice paper. Inside there is cuttlefish bone, for the phallic shape. Sometimes knobu (whatever that is I didn't read it) and sometimes kelp. That's basically the engagement.

I can't find anything on more actual arrangement but I would think it's a bit like Chinese go-betweens.

In the feudal era (the time you're looking for) it seemed to be they really didn't get a choice and the man picked his wife and they got married. The general name for that way of marriage was "bushi". Japan was mostly in control by samurai.

They still had dowry and divorce but divorce during the 13-1400's brought a lot of shame upon the husband and wife.

Correct me if I'm wrong someone.
by Dragoness rate this post as useful

A few corrections already 2007/12/24 11:19
If you are talking about the gift exchange between the two families, then it is called "yuino."

"Bushi" means the warriors/samurai. It was not a name for any wedding/engagement ceremony.

There would have been vast differences between the customs of the common people and those in the upper-class families; more proper research would be needed.
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