Can my pen pal stay at my House?

If my pen pal were visiting me, would it be safe to allow her to stay at my home, or would you recommend that she stay at a hotel?

Sincerely,

Melissa

In what way would it not be "safe" to have her at your home? Do you mean that you might not be able to trust her? If so, it would be hard for us to judge- you know her better than we do.

If it's a different reason, maybe you could explain a bit further?

I agree with the previous poster. You should tell us more details. Merely saying the person is a pen pal does not tell us much. Also, you would know them better than we would.

It's not that I don't trust her or anything, but I heard that, according to a posting to one of my questions last summer, that you should exercise caution when a pen pal wishes to stay at a person's house because of the threat or being robbed in "the night" I don't know if that's true or not.

I'm sorry if I didn't make myself clear the first time I posted this. My pen pal, whom I've been convincing to come visit me and have been writing to since June 2007, appears to be truthful in her letters and when sending me gifts. For example, before Christmas, she promised that I'd get a callendar, and sure enough I got one as promised. If she did come to visit me, would it be safe enough to allow her to stay at my home?

Again, I appologize for not being clear the first time, but there are times where I am at a loss for words where I cannot find the write words to compose a perfect sentence! ^__^

Always exercise caution with someone that you've never met and letting them in your home. Japanese people really don't steal and are not AS prone to break the law as Americans are (assuming that's where you are. On the other hand, you're asking other strangers about strangers...It sounds like you're worried about it. What I would do is recommend a nice hotel near your place offer to pick her up at the airport, and take her around. Once you feel comfortable bring her to your house and see how she acts. If you're ok with what she does, then invite her to stay with you so she can save money. To not sound like you're worried about her though, that would push her away from wanting to visit you. Have you seen this person on webcam or talked to them on the phone? Those might people able to help with trust etc.

You have to think of it logically, do you think someone is going to spend a some hundreds of dollars for a plane ticket, take time off of work for a vacation, so they can fly internationally thousands of miles just to rob your house in the middle of the night, all this after leaving a paper trail of who they are, fingerprints, photographs and all (US Airport immigration).
Of course that is the EXTREME.

I assume when you got the Calendar gift, it did came from Japan, and not say the next city over (return address and customs form), the likelyhood then is generally on the safe side. Unless you think its a global con scheme where someone nearby city pretends to be from Japan, writes you as a pen pal for a year or whatever, then knows someone in Japan to send a package to you from Japan to pretend the person trying to con you lives in Japan @_@. LOL

Honestly, I think you will be ok in this case. If you meet the person and think they are a con person and is going to do a global scam or something then I would recommend a hotel to them.

But again it depends on your comfort level and and instincts.

Good points. Still exercise caution. Remember you're asking other strangers about another stranger.

As mentioned, I think the point is that you don't "really" know this person than you think.

Sure (s)he may not be a professional theif, but we all have had classmates who lie for stupid reasons or steal silly things that is not worth stealing or start complaining about things you wouldn't usually expect them to, right?

Penpal or not, a person you've never met or don't know who their families are is practically a stranger. That's the kind of risk you have.

That said, as long as you acknowledge these risks, you are of course free to invite anyone to your guest bedroom. Some people even go out there and have a homeless guy stay over.

Personally, when I meet penpals for the first time, we usually stay at different places, because there is always a difference between getting along in written form and getting along meeting in person. After seeing each other for a couple of times, my penpal and I traveled to the other side of the world and shared hotel rooms together, which was great fun.

I forgot to mention that she has sent photos of herself together with her actual letters to me. Even though she has sent photos of herself to me, would staying ay my house still be a "No, No?"

It is not a , no no, its what your comfort level is with the person.

First I would like to say that a person that has enough money to travel 8000 plus miles to visit you is not likely to rob or steel from you. You should have some idea what that person is like by now. If you would like to know just who is likely to rob you, go down town to a large US city and look around.
Look around your house and if you can find one furnishing that would fetch over $1,000 on the drug market, I don�ft mean is worth $1,000 but would bring over $1,000 then you could be a little apprehensive. That is also what home owners insurance is for. If you don�ft have home owners insurance you probably don�ft have anything worth steeling. Either way you are covered. As far as having large amounts of cash in your home, that is what bank, and credit cards are for.
Making your pen pal stay at a hotel is a big insult. Personal possessions are not worth as much as personal friendships.
I am not saying that all Japanese can be trusted, but I would trust a Japanese person 100 times more than anyone else.

Melissa, like John wrote, nobody (at least here) is saying it's a no no. And nobody is really saying she is lying or what not. A photo really doesn't explain much.

But you seem to want to let her stay at your home. Then why not? Take your risks. You will probably have fun. But we aren't going to say "no problem" and take responsibility for it. We don't know her. We don't even know you!