Advice...I can’t take it anymore!

Hello friends,

I have posted many times on this forum before, but because this concerns my job I would like to keep my identity hidden.

Here is my situation...I came to Japan not too long ago to become an ALT. I LOVE Japan and have come here on several occasions for homestays, and studying abroad. I just knew I wanted to live here! 2 years ago I was offered an amazing art internship in ochanomizu at a prestigious company (this for my dream job!)...the only problem is that it was non paid, and if I did move up eventually the pay would be poor. I wanted to find a job that I could hold for a few years until I could live off my art job in Japan, or until my fiancee could make enough money to support us while I follow my dreams (since you can never be too sure with in income in art)...

So, I decided to become an ALT, an idea that I had had since the 9th grade. I finally snagged a job with a great ALT company who has been more than supportive to all it's new employees (especially for me...they have really gone out of their way...). After that I contacted Kurihara san, an editor of the company to confirm that I will be able to start my internship in early September.

Now my problem started when I arrived to do my training. I originally wanted to ALT at highschool (seems like an easy job right?), as I had specified in previous e-mails to the company and stated in my resume and my interview that my strengths lay with older kids, not young children...but some how I was pulled apart from the rest of the group and asked to teach kindergarten, along with 2 others. The only difference I had is that I would be at one school ONLY (lucky I thought!...but far from it)... Technically the school is not a kindergarten, (although it runs like one) it is a day care (hoikuen). I was worried at first, but my supervisor told me I would be perfect for the position,"It's all fun and games," and in the circumstances I was in (which I can't get into details) I needed a position and a place to move into right away. So me (being an idiot) and just saying yes to everyone, I signed my life away for one year at this kindergarten/daycare. I loved doing our "English time" (for the most part) but feared most everything else. The school was definitely NOT what I had expected, and most of the important details (in my opinion) where kept towards the end, when it was almost too late to turn back. Besides the already stressful environment of teaching kindergarten, we have to make our own lesson plans (not too big a deal) and handle a class on our own (yes...it's not an ALT position). Doesn't sound too hard, but when you have several class clowns who just want to play and 8 other 4 year olds who want to follow what they're doing, you're going to end up coming home with a few gray hairs and a lost voice.

I'm sure many people still wouldn't see this as a problem, I was just so surprised when I look back at how this even happened. Besides the fact that I let them know I have NO experience with children (this including in real life too...not just work experience...yes I am the youngest of my family..)...I was also the youngest ALT there! I just turned 21 this year (I graduated early), and I was given the position with the MOST responsibility. During all your work time you have to keep your eyes on these kids. When we play outside, when we're in class, if they cry, if they don't share, when they eat lunch, when they use the potty...ALL THE FRIGGEN TIME! We don't get a break! My contract said I will only work 30 teaching hours (which was great for me so I could do my art internship on the side in Tokyo...) but the school wants us to be there to BABYSIT, because it's a daycare too!!! That means I end up working almost 50 hours a week....which 20 hours of it is wasting time (and no I can't write lesson plans during this time, since I'm watching them...I have to do those at home). So there goes my dreams of my internship in Tokyo (which is about 1h45m from where I live currently).

At this point I would just DEAL with it, and I'm sure most of you are thinking it too. I signed a contract, and I planned to stick with it.

Truthfully speaking, the schedule thing DID bother me, but it wasn't going to detour me from my responsibilities. I actually did have a lot of fun, and it wasn't all that bad...but for some reason I just couldn't shake off my nerves. I've been on medication for anxiety and stress in the past, so after months of trying to be free of the medication (which thank God I did) I seem to need it now more than ever. No matter how many times I say "They're just kids..." or "nothing is going to happen" before I go to sleep, I can't get a good nights sleep. I wake up several times at night sweating profusely (even with the A/C blasting) from nightmares, or stress about these kids. When I finally wake up for work in the morning, I vomit and have diarrhea. To add to the problems, at least 3 days last week I arrived to school with a fever...and I felt so terrible, I just had to excuse myself to go to the bathroom to cry from all the pain and discomfort...to of course be welcomed again by screaming children.

I just couldn't take it anymore, and thanks to a comment by the principal of the small school, she told me if I had any problems to please bring them up now while they can be fixed. I went to speak to my supervisor, and he made it sound like it would be impossible for me to change. After speaking straight to my actual boss, he took concern when I told him of the physical whip lash I'm getting from the job. "I just feel overwhelmed and like I can't take it anymore" I added. Shachou basically told me to hold on a little longer and he'll find me another position...he of course presented me his concerns like "How do I know this won't happen again?" and I earnestly told him "don't give me kindergarten please"...my preference was high school. The next day at work I spoke with my supervisor and asked if he spoke with shachou about my position. He told me he spoke with him briefly and that to put it bluntly "We don't have anything for you". He just wanted me to fulfill my contract, and maybe by March they MIGHT be able to switch me around to another school. I just couldn't take it...I just cried and cried and cried in the bathroom. I've never wanted to go home so bad, but I was in such a jam. As a foreigner, ALT is pretty much all I have. If I brake my contract by trying to get another job with another company or leave the country, I would 1) loose my visa and 2) my company would (as said in our contract) contact some ALT bureau thing where they let all hiring companies know that I can't keep a contract...basically I'd be screwed, and chances of ever getting another ALT job is slim. If I do stick with them, I might end up having panic attacks again, and likely have to go to the hospital and be on medication, yay :)
I know at this point nothing can be done, and I should just wait to see if shachou does find something for me...but after my supervisor told me there is nothing and to keep working here, I've lost a bit of hope. I just can't take the stress, and physical effects this job is having on my body. And the best part is, I haven't had full responsibility of all classes yet, and next week I will be 100% on my own. Besides my monthly women time just jumping on me the same week, I can generally say I'm not too excited about tomorrow (Monday) or this whole week to say the least.

To top it off, my feeling of regret quadrupled this weekend after hanging out with most of the ALT's I did training with. All of them are telling me they are having a blast at their schools. They are working considerably less hours than I am, and have a pretty much stress free environment (while getting paid the same, and receive the same benefits as I do). Lesson plans are made for them, and they have full support of a Japanese teacher with them. I wish so bad I could be in their shoes, I could even have enough time to go do my internship in Tokyo (the reason I came to Japan in the first place), but I can't...I'm stuck. I'm lying to my family everyday about my situation, and I'm sick of not knowing where I am. I have always been a very decisive girl I know what I want, I know where I want to be, and this is how I will do it...but not this time. All I have been doing is crying, and praying, and visiting the toilet too many times. I'm almost all out of my American OTC meds, and I just don't know how much more I can take...please help..if you have any advice...

sorry for the long post...

-Anonymous

P.S.
To clarify, my contract is not with the actual school, but with the company...if that makes any difference at all.

First of all, I feel for you. I'm sorry the company has treated you like that.

There is no excuse to be working 50 hours a week as an ALT. If a Japanese company makes you work more than 30 hours a week, they need to treat you like a full employee, which means health insurance, pension insurance, etc. Are you getting these benefits? You might want to contact the ministry of labor.

In situations where I feel helpless/panicky I tend to step aside and look at my options. Forget about the impossible. You basically have three choices: 1) give up and go home 2) put up with it until the contract expires 3) look for another job at an employer who will sponsor your visa. I think if you explain the situation to a potential employer they would understand why you want to break your current contract (after all, your current employer has broken your contract by having you work more hours than you are supposed to, and have broken the verbal contract by having you work with kids).

I am also an English teacher and while the situation is not as bad at yours (not even close), I do have kids classes and they are awful. I can barely stand the 3 hours a week of kindergarten classes I have to teach (most of my classe are with grammar school age kids), so I can't imagine being in your shoes!

If you decide not to just give up, my advice to you is to focus on what is important about Japan. In my case, I love martial arts and learning Japanese. I can put up with a job I hate if I can look forward to my jujutsu class on the weekend, and can unwind every week after a hard day at work at a nearby bar, having a drink and practicing Japanese conversation.

Your art internship is very important. If you need to, find another job so that you can pursue this. It is hard for foreigners in Japan, you need to find something to keep you here regardless of all the obstacles.

Good luck, I hope you will not give up your dream because of one rotten company. Think of it as a challenge! Don't let your employer win!

Sunday is the worst time for teachers who have lots of work to do and are dreading facing all that young, chaotic energy in class on Monday morning. I'm an English teacher, too, and my heart goes out to you trying to cope with such a difficult set of circumstances with none of the usual supports you would get at home. The contrast with the other ALTs makes it worse for you - but don't stop seeing them. The dream of living and working overseas treads a fine line with nightmare. Your physical reactions to the stress tell a potent story of what you are enduring. I wish we could help you more on this forum apart from offering empathy and advice, but be reassured that your horrible situation won't have to last too much longer. There WILL be ways out. That doesn't make tomorrow any better- or Tuesday or Wednesday. Does it help at all to visualise all the teachers who are similarly agonising about tomorrow? You are alone, but not alone. Keep writing if it helps. I can understand why you don't want to alarm your family, who must have been thrilled for you going off to pursue your dream. You haven't been there long enough to make friends. It will come good, but the present will seem endless....

Reading your post was painful. I can feel your anguish in your writing. You cannot continue like this. Nothing, I mean nothing is worth your health. You've alluded to taking anti-anxiety medication which you are almost out of. You really need to seek professional help. You cannot continue to live in misery. Your health will continue to deteriorate, and in the end, you will not physically be able to continue.

First off, thank you Al for your prompt and supportive message. Yes I am in a bit of a jam, but the company can treat me like this when it comes to my working hours. On hour contract it says we will work a maximum of 30 teaching hours. Planning, meetings, and other miscellaneous reasons a school would want me to stay after school is not considered "work time". They do this so they don't to enter us into the pension plan and loose a lot of money on us...I understand this, and knew this before I even signed my contract. Most of the other ALT's do have to stay after school maybe an hour or two max, but these hours are used for their lesson planning, meetings, or hell, even studying Japanese! This is the kind of thing I was expecting. In my case, when school ends, the daycare starts, in which we watch students all afternoon, sometimes as late as 6 (so I could be working even later...luckily we're usually able to go home by 5:30). The earliest we can leave anyway is 5:15, even if we have finished all of our chores and all students have left. After I was told about this rule, I had one of those moments while cleaning the toilets "Wow this is what I went to college for?"...The point is, I feel like I'm actually working and not getting that alone time I need for planning. It's just watching them play...which although it doesn't seem so bad, whenever you have a group of 3-5 year olds just going at it, it's nuts! Friday alone I had 5 kids crying at the SAME time, (it was like a chemical reaction!) because someone wouldn't share, or someone hit someone else, or because they called them something, or someone tattle-tailed...it's just nuts...

Recently I brought this up to the attention of the company, and they said they were going to work something out to allow us to go home at 3PM once a week. This was because we all had to stay until 5:15 everyday no matter what. Even if there was one kid, all 4 teachers had to sit and be with him or her (even though the law says only 2 adults need to be there). I'm sure the other teachers didn't complain because they are not from native English speaking countries, and with the new strictness about instructor visas (that you can only teach the language of your nationality) they didn't bring it up. I'm the only native English speaker (from and English speaking country) in the kindergarten.

About my plans, I want to stay in Japan as long as I can. As of now, I plan to stay with my contract, and just deal with it, but if I could I would look for another job and explain my situation. The problem is I feel like I owe my company so much. I said I didn't want to get into specifics of why I felt so obliged to them, but I'll just spill the beans. I planned to move here, and possibly for good. My fiancee (who grew up here but lived in the states for 12 years where we met) decided to move back with me to Japan. On top of that, I endured the long process of bringing my dog with me to Japan (since I had no one to take care of her). When I arrived in Japan they knew about my situation, and I had my dog stay in a dog hotel, my fiancee in a people hotel. They told me I should take this kindergarten position, because they found a mansion for 65000yen a month that allows dogs and has a garden to boot! It was like a dream come true! On top of that, the company played with the rules a bit (maybe shachou saw potential in me?) and allowed me to live with my fiancee (even though company rules could not do that unless we were married) as well as the dog. His wife worked as my guarantor for the apartment as well. Of course I signed a contract that I would take full responsibility in case my dog or fiancee decided to make of mess of things, but I still felt like they did almost too much for me. I just don't know what to do, they have been so kind, and it's not their fault. I said yes to kindergarten, and the principal is the one making these idiotic rules that we ALL have to stay until 5:15 everyday anyway. So this is where my dilemma is...I want to do whats in my best interest, but in my situation (especially living in a country like Japan) I feel like I have to pay my dues.

To Aki, thank you again for your reply. I'm very worried about being sick as well. All I hope for is that shachou will help me find a new position. He has been more prospective on me finding another position than my supervisor. He even understood that I liked teaching kindergarten but it made me nervous and sick. He said himself "It's like you have an allergy to chocolate, you love it but it makes you sick." I love teaching, maybe I just wasn't ready to work with such young children, as well as doing the other activities we have to do with children...it's too much for someone like me. To teach kindergarten you need to be a special kind of person. Always happy, sarcastic, loving, patient, confident understanding, etc...and although I fit the bill of a lot of those, I feel like I can't be that 24-7 with a smile on my face. I had to teach classes with stomach pains, nausea, and fever and keep a happy face for several days a week...it's too much. I just want out...I hope shachou will find something else for me...

I feel really bad for you. I don't know if this is a way to fix things, but does anything in your contract specifically state what an ALT is and what the duties of an ALT are? You say you are alone with the kids teaching them yourself, but I thought an ALT was to have the support of a full time Japanese teacher with them. If your contract says anything along that lines maybe that is your leverage to get them to change what you are doing. It is just a thought.

If your fiance is Japanese then get married ASAP and get a spousal visa, then you wouldn't have to worry about work sponsors anymore.

I'm sorry but so what the company did some nice things for you, but they are also screwing you over a lot too. I mean you wrote half a book about how they are messing you up. Do you REALLY feel that much of a sense of duty to them. I don't.
ALTs come and go all the time, find a new job that fits your hours and get out of the situation you are in.

I agree with John. Just because they did a lot of nice stuff for you doesn't mean they get to treat you like this. English teachers simply do not work 50 hours a week. That's insane. If they are making you work 50 hours a week but are only claiming you are working 30 so that they don't have to provide benefits, that is frankly illegal regardless of what your contract says.

The company I work for got into a TON of trouble for doing something like this. They were requiring 30 hours of teaching and then another 10+ hours a week of office time, but were claiming only 30 hours in their paperwork. All it took was for one pissed off employee to report it (wasn't me btw, I came in after this had all happened). The most we work now is 30 hours period, that includes office time, prep time, teaching, and transportation.

Don't marry your spouse just to get a visa... however, if you are planning on getting married anyway, it might be beneficial to get this done now instead of later.

If it were me I would just break my contract and leave that company- life is too short to be stuck at a job you hate. Did your company tell you would lose your visa if you quit? That is absolutely not true- your visa is yours, and you can work for whoever you want. The company has no power to cancel your visa whatsoever so don't believe anything along those lines that they tell you.

Threatening to blacklist you may well also be illegal, and I very much doubt there is any such cartel of ALT dispatchers that would then refuse to hire you as it would be quite a dodgy business practice and there is a Labor Standards Bureau in Japan that would probably be interested in such threats. Don't listen to anything like that and go ahead and quit if you are miserable.

Quite a few years back I was working at one of the large eikaiwas, and after a couple of years I got to the point that I disliked the job so much that even though I am not a stress or anxiety-prone person I actually broke out in hives one day while I was teaching- I am convinced it was from the stress.

Is there any reason you haven't tried working at an eikaiwa yet? ALT isn't the only option.

A company you might want to look at working for is Gaba- under their old management they had a bad reputation for not treating teachers well but new management has totally turned this around and although the pay is not high (it's actually comparable to some ALT jobs though) it is a pretty-much stress-free job where you get to choose exactly the schedule you want and management does not breathe down your neck at all- no observations or recorded lessons like at some eikaiwas.

I work there part time to supplement my income and it is such an easy job. You only teach adults in one-on-one lessons unless you want to teach kids, and the students tend to be very motivated. You do have to wear a suit but to me that is a small price to pay for having such a flexible schedule and stress-free job.

Even if it's just until you find something else it might be worth looking into as an option to keep money coming in while you are looking around.

The problem with Gaba (aside from their **** poor wages) is they don't sponsor visas, so when it comes to Visa renewal time, you'll need a new sponsor. Hopefully you'll either be married to a Japanese by then (assuming your finance is Japanese national) or you changed jobs to one that can sponsor visas.
BTW marriage is just paperwork in Japan at the city hall, the party and ceremony is just all show, you can always save the ceremony and party for later.

But whatever the case I'd leave whatever company you work for now the way your describing how you are reacting to it.

John, Gaba does now sponsor visas for some applicants, and Anonymous sounds like someone they might sponsor (experience, native English speaker).

They have also raised their per lesson rate to a point where the hourly rate is now about the same as many ALT jobs. The downside is that there are no paid holidays and they don't pay for your transport. You may also not get a full schedule until you build up a student base.

The upside is the flexibility which leaves you free to pursue other jobs/ interests.

It's very important that Anonymous realises his/her company has lied about the visa conditions though- in Japan you are not tied to any company, there is no way they can have your visa cancelled.

Gaba was one of the first companies I interviewed at after coming to Japan. They might be good as a supplement to your income, but I wouldn't suggest them as a primary job. The fact that they do not pay for transportation is extremely suspect... pretty much every legit company in Japan reimburses your transportation costs... it is just expected. Had I worked there, I would have been responsible for paying about 12000 yen a month in transportation!

They also schedule office time for you where you do not get paid unless a student shows up out of thin air and wants a lesson with you. If this is not correct I am sorry, but this is how the interviewer explained the system to me. That struck me as pretty awful.

My suggestion to the original poster is to look into the various eikaiwa companies. When I sent my resume out to the various eikaiwa I got probably 6 responses immediately, even though I had no experience whatsoever.

Since you are in Japan and have experience, you are almost guaranteed a job. You'll get the standard 250,000 yen a month and work 30 hours a week, and have your transportation reimbursed of course.

Gaba doesn't schedule any office time for you where you might not get paid. You are absolutely free to choose your own schedule, and then it is true that if a student doesn't book a particular lesson you won't be paid for that time. However you are able to check how much of your schedule has filled online at home and you are under no obligation to stay in the building if you have no student. I would say 80% lessons filled is about average, so most people schedule a few more than they are hoping for, and then just close the ones that don't fill. Popular teachers (who are the good, experienced teachers rather than the best-looking or most genki) often have full schedules every day.

Even though transport is not paid, because of the contract type you can claim all work expenses against your taxes the next year, including transport, clothing, food eaten during work time, and even internet connection and a percentage of your computer costs because they are work expenses. I got over 100,000 as a tax rebate this year because I claimed expenses against my Gaba income.

I do agree that it isn't the best job for the long-term, however it would be a way for Anonymous to get out of his/her present situation and have an income while looking for something else. Just a suggestion.

Thank you all for your helpful suggestions! I've been looking over my contract and trying to find a loop hole...so far none...except that we don't have to clean toilets, and our principal makes us clean the toilets...still not a good argument to change me to another school though. I will wait until tomorrow once I speak to my supervisor to see if they are actually working on fixing this.

Now a quick question, if I do change companies, what do I do? My apartment is under the companies name...and I had to pay rent up front...so I had to spend around 380000 yen!!! This of course included fees for the Realtor, my dog, key money etc...but I can't afford to move again and pay all those fee's again. I could switch it back to my name, but I wont get my gaikokujin toryokusho until the 26th of this month...see when I came to Japan I still didn't have my work visa, I had to change it in Tokyo.

Also...I have a Geos by my home, does anyone know if they are any good?

Have a look at the dedicated teaching in Japan sites like the Japan job forum on www.eslcafe.com , discussions on various jobs on www.letsjapan.org/forum and also the Japan board of ELT world: http://eltworld.net/forums/viewforum.php?f=35

You'll probably find that either all your questions have already been answered or that someone will be able to answer then in detail- lots of discussions on eslcafe about Geos for example.

Sorry, that should be http://www.letsjapan.org/forum/

Yes I know they sponser for "some" people, however the vast majority of their teachers aren't sponsored by them, most of their sponsored folks are their full time staff, rather then their "contracted" teachers who are NOT sponsored by them. And yes I'm aware they raised the minimum a whole 100extra yen! 1500yen for one on one lessons, thats still a joke. It is comparable to some ALT jobs if you take into consideration a full schedule, at least ALTs have some job security. For Gaba to start sponsoring actual Visas for their contracted teachers would mean for them to have full time employee teachers, which would mean for them to start providing "real" benefits, which isn't afforded to most of the "contract teachers".
Filing income and getting a tax break on transportation is no substitute for actual reimbursement of train fare.

While flexible scheduling might be good for the Original Poster, that's the ONLY good thing it has going. I bet you a million when it comes to Visa renewal time, Gaba wouldn't sponsor any of its current contracted teachers. If you are really really desperate then Gaba might be a stop gap, but for the love of it, there are a lot of higher paying part-time jobs out there that come with security. Check out the links provided by Sira or www.jobsinjapan.com

The flexible schedule may not even be much of a benefit. During the interview this came up and I was told that although Gaba as a company is flexible, your schedule is basically written by your students. I was told that as a new teacher I would basically have to work evenings and weekends if I wanted a realistic income, as students during the day tended to be a little more "elite" and would not be happy being taught by a new teacher, with no experience at the company.

Look at it like this. I have absolutely no experience teaching English whatsoever. And I had six schools contacting me within a day or so of applying for English teacher positions. The school I ended up signing up with offered me the job at the end of the interview they were so desperate. The OP has experience and actually likes teaching, he should have no problem getting a job at an eikaiwa with a salary, transportation reimbursement, paid days off, no need to file his own taxes, etc etc.

As for the apartment issue, this is tricky. You see, this is how these schools "trap" you. You may think they are being nice to you by helping you out with the apartment, etc... but you realize now the control they have over you!

Now, I want to just say that no one on this board knows the situation you are in as well as you do. We all seem to be assuming the company you are dealing with is screwing you, but maybe the truth is they have good intentions and are just bungling things up. However, any company that would make you work 20 extra hours a week for free and offers no full time benefits is a little suspect in my opinion.

If you can switch the apartment over to your name once you get your registration card, wait until you get the card and then do that.

Honestly, from what I have read any eikaiwa (other than NOVA) is about the same. For the larger chains, a lot will depend upon the regional manager. For the smaller schools, it will depend on the owner. I've heard good and bad things about GEOS, but that could be said for any company in the world.

Typically, it usually won't matter if the school is close to you or not. As an example, I was communicating with one chain, mostly because one of their schools is a 5 minute walk from my apartment. However, the rep told me that the job would require me traveling to different schools nearly every day of the week. Not a big problem, since most legit companies pay for transportation. But just don't get too excited about there being a school nearby because you most likely will only work there a day or two a week, if ever. GEOS may be different, but my impression is that the eikaiwa companies shuttle their teachers around all over the place.

After writing my reply mentioning maybe I am being too hard on your company, I reread your post and now think I was being too easy on them!

First of all, let me apologize for calling you "he" and "him." For some reason I missed the parts in your initial post mentioning you are a woman.

Now, about your company. I had forgotten about the threats of taking your visa away and somehow blackmailing you with other ALT companies! Rereading that it cast your company in a new light I think.

Think of what they did for you. Sure it cost them money, but they didn't do anything your typical eikaiwa won't do. Most places are happy to find you a place to live (either because they have a relationship with the landlord/management company, or just because it's another means of control).

Now look at all the terrible things they have done to you. They lied about your responsibilities (teachings high school kids vs kindergarten/preschool kids). They overwork you compared to other ALTs you work with. They are claiming you only work 30 hours a week, just to save a buck at your expense. Another way of saying this is that they are basically stealing from you. By law Japanese companies have to provide certain benefits to workers that work over 30 hours a week.

Most schools have learned their lesson regarding work hours thanks to the NOVA debacle, but the company you work for has not.

Think about all of this! Is it any wonder they went out and found an apartment for you? It was just a cheap trick to get you to trust them, and now they can basically do whatever they want with your duties and hours because they are betting you will just take it because they were so "nice" to you!

If you can get the apartment in your name, this would be best as it would be prohibitively expensive to move.

Look at your options, and try to find a new job if you can. These people have done nothing nice for you.