confused about what to wear to wedding

Hello,

I have read through the forums and am still a bit confused about what to wear to a wedding I will be attending in Tokyo next month.
I am fashion conscious and am a 37 y.o. american woman....just want to put that out there because.......
I have been told that Japanese women really go all out in their dress for weddings, and living in Tokyo I can only imagine.
I have 2 dresses that I would like to wear, as I really don't want to buy something new. I'll describe them briefly:

1. jewel toned silk,kind of a paisley print,knee length, a bit low in the cleveage, but not excessively and my breasts are not big, elegant/sexy...but not too???
2. pink with a funky print, just above the knee, betsey johnson, cute with beaded belt and ruffle, more fun/flirty than the other

I would wear a cover/shrug over these as they only have small straps.
Will either work, or am I going to have to buy something more plain?

A couple more questions:

1. Can I wear fishnet stockings? Strappy sandals with a heel?

I really appreciate any advice, especially current advice on a contemporary wedding.
The party is at the Prince Hotel and in the afternoon.

Thanks!

I would perhaps go with the plainer of the two, or buy something solid colour- you won't see any funky prints on the Japanese people attending, no matter how young and alternative. I would skip the fishnets for this occasion as well.

I agree with Sira. When in doubt, it is better to dress conservatively. Please remember it is time for the bride to shine. You could also try rental dresses.

I meant to mention the shoes- strappy sandals with heels are standard wedding footwear for younger women in the warmer months, so those should be fine.

I hope it will be warm enough for sleeveless dresses in a month's time- at the rate we are going it seems hard to believe!

for the advice.....and yeah...i hope it's warmer too!

i guess my confusion is coming from what i have been told japanese women dress like for weddings.....very decorated!

once my now sister in law came back from a wedding and she looked like she had just come from a really fancy funeral.
black with a big fur thing, lots of jewelry and make-up.....really unnatural and not dressed 'down' at all.

as am american i understand not wanting to take attention from the bride.....but people have told me that the japanese women are very 'showy'....one of my students who is korean even mentioned this to me.

so, is it the print that i should avoid?
and fishnets seem pretty standard to me.......what am i supposed to wear on my legs?

i pride myself on always dressing for the occasion, and i don't want to stick out or appear inappropriate, but i don't really care if i look different....i'm a foreigner anyway, so that's inevitable.

thanks for any insight....oh and dress rental is out of the question..... just a personal thing;-)

oh, people definitely dress up, the point is that it's formal dress-up, so solid colours rather than prints- you said yourself that your sister-in-law wore a black dress. Other popular colours seem to be peach, light pink, blue, green etc.

As for what to wear on your legs... well, fishnets aren't the only option! Ordinary pantyhose or stockings rather than fishnets would be better, but wear what you like.

To sum up, if you don't want to stand out with your clothes, then: solid colours or very subtle pattern at the most, ordinary pantyhose, medium heel shoe.

i dont mean any offence to anyone here coz the fashion here in japan is awesome and one of the best in the world. but i just want to try to give this lady some idea of what to expect. japanese are very conservative, so no bust showing, and shoulders are normally out too. wedding party style is ......more like something id expect my grandmother (i'm in my early 30's) to wear, with a dress! pearls, lace, fur, frills, and no not in the sexy kinda way. so this is what your friends are meaning about dressing up. I wouldnt be seen dead wearing anything like this, and like you say, you are a foreigner so you will stand out anyway. but, i'd keep it conservative, and plain colours as the others suggested. bright colours arent seen here much, only amongst the teenagers, so you really will stand out if you come in a bright coloured outfit. and i really wouldnt go with the fishnets.

i love to shop and love clothes, so naturally, i spend a fair amount of time shopping in tokyo....i even thought of starting a service or writing a book about where to shop for what......but....this wedding thing is a whole new area for me and one that i am not enjoying.
i'm planning my outfit, so i've been looking around and wow is all i can say......even if i wanted to buy a new dress it would take a lot of effort and time to find one that is acceptable. i've checked zara and benetton as well, but the selection is thin.
i just can't imagine......the whole experience will definitely be a new cultural eye-opener.
as far as what i'm wearing......i'm going to look a bit more, but will probably go with the jewel toned slip dress i have. it can be dressed up as much as i want to, and i really don't care if no one else is wearing a print.
no one will have a tattoo either!