Preparation for Japan. Any more?

Please, please, please don't let an obsession with staying thin ruin your time in Japan. I was an exchange student in the USA when I was 16, and I was obsessed with trying not to put on any weight while there. I had been told that the US diet would make me gain at least 15 pounds in my year abroad. Looking back now I wish I had just enjoyed myself and embraced American culture instead of dieting and worrying for a year. The diet in Japan is very healthy in general and there are so many wonderful foods to try - please just enjoy your time there! :)

I am a slim male in North America yet cannot fit in Japanese clothes for men my height. Because I am muscular my shoulders are wider and my waist smaller than a Japanese guy my height and perhaps even my weight
Do I think that I am fat because of that? not at all!
PLEASE stop your unhealthy obsession with weight and size! we are all concerned about you.

Sorry, I just realised that you have spent some time in Japan, enough to develop this idea you have anyway. What I said in my post still stands, and you can see I'm not the only one who thinks so. Forget about the "75 percent" or any other percentage, eat healthily (i.e. to at least maintain your current weight), and enjoy your stay in Japan, enjoy your youth, without being constantly fixated on your weight.

I'm sorry but I'm going to be blunt about this.. I think your attitude is naive and actually disgusting. My pocchari girlfriend is very sexy and healthy. So much better looking than very slim girls. I'd be concerned by an adult woman who claimed to be proud of her boney shoulders and limbs.

Right now you are 14 and you probably have the body of a fairly normal 14 year old... but your ideals are scary.

You've heard some well advised adults explain that an inadequate diet is dangerous, please think about that at least.

Izzie: Please, please, please don't let an obsession with staying thin ruin your time in Japan.

I won't, I promise :) I cut down on foods that I am indifferent about, but still eat the foods I love no matter how unhealthy they are. I have recently cut down on milk intake (I reckon that at my age, it's no longer gonna help with my growth anyway). McD's is my fav restaurant. I know their food makes me fat but I still dine there once or twice a week. If I love a certain food enough, I am willing to sacrifice for it in moderation.

Red Frog: I am a slim male in North America yet cannot fit in Japanese clothes for men my height. Because I am muscular my shoulders are wider and my waist smaller than a Japanese guy my height and perhaps even my weight

That's exactly what I am worried about. I may be slightly slimmer than the avg Japanese girl my age, yet still may not be able to fit Japanese clothes for my age as I have wider hips. In other words, I have to weigh less than a Japanese girl to fit the same size. Well you are not worried about size as you are not a teenage girl :) I know I wouldn't be worried if I were a boy.

Sira: eat healthily (i.e. to at least maintain your current weight), and enjoy your stay in Japan, enjoy your youth, without being constantly fixated on your weight.

I have a question. Do I have to eat healthy to maintain my weight? I have been able to maintain my weight without eating that healthy. I eat around 2 servings of veggies, 3 servings of fruits everyday. To me that's more than enough. The rest of my food tends to be deep fried, oily and high in cholesterol... I think it's ok as those are only necessary to be cut down when one reaches middle age.

cissehands: I'm sorry but I'm going to be blunt about this.. I think your attitude is naive and actually disgusting. My pocchari girlfriend is very sexy and healthy. So much better looking than very slim girls. I'd be concerned by an adult woman who claimed to be proud of her boney shoulders and limbs.
Right now you are 14 and you probably have the body of a fairly normal 14 year old... but your ideals are scary.

It's ok, you don't have to be sorry for being blunt :) An ideal weight is relative. They are many girls much heavier than I am and are happy with their weight. But I personally wouldn't be happy so I watch my weight. Most adult women probably wouldn't be proud to be boney because then they would be squished in bed. I don't plan to lose it for the next 5 years, so I should be ok :)

I know how you feel because I've been to Japan several times (moving there for good after 4 months) and every time I go there the first 2 days are hell. I feel self-concious and awkward and think I'm a giant compared to Japanese girls. BUT after those 2 days I'm back to my normal confident self.

First, our bone structure is totally different. Japanese girls have slimmer hips because their hip BONES are not as wide as ours. No matter how much weight you lose you're never going to have the hips of a Japanese girl because you just can't make your bones disappear. I'm a slim adult, not proud of it but can't change it (due to an illness). My hip bones poke out in a really ugly way so it's fairly obvious my hips are not getting any slimmer, but they are still wider than most Japanese women's hps. We just can't change our bone structure and even if we could I don't understand why we should.

Another thing is that all japanese people I have met have told me I'm really sexy because I have wider hips (and bigger boobs). So, believe me, hips are not an issue.

Btw, there's a video on youtube of Beyonce on a Japanese talk show and everybody is yelling "kawaii". With all respect, I wouldn't call Beyonce thin. She's perfectly curveous.

Hehe, they would be squished in bed, does everything revolve around that. Well, it's great that you're so positive..

I was just worried that you're shrugging off everyones concerns and remaining dead set in your own opinion.

About eating healthy..

Problems aren't only related to your 5 a day, cholesterol and fats. Your body wont function nicely if you dont feed it well. Period problems, headaches, risk of bowel cancer.. lots of things are possible...

I'll leave it there.

Hold on a minute.. You're worried about weight so much and you said "I know I wouldn't be worried if I were a boy."

Listen out for guys being called too skinny.. you might even say that yourself. It's perfectly common for people to critisize a mans body, especially when it's for not having much muscle. I guess you'd become obsessed with muscle gain, if you were a guy.


and about the needing less milk. it's a good slow supply of protein and calcium is good for a lot.. a quick search tells me that adults require 800mg while young adults 11-14 y/o require 1200mg.

"An ideal weight is relative. They are many girls much heavier than I am and are happy with their weight. But I personally wouldn't be happy so I watch my weight."

No, that's a wrong conclusion. If you're a healthy person but not happy with your weight, you should watch your ideals and thoughts and obsessions, NOT your weight. Once you get your psychological issues sorted out, you'll be happy with your weight, as long as you're healthy. I know it's a hard goal to reach, and one that many adult women have not attained (and will never attain), but it's still worth attempting.

The reason being, you can "watch your weight" all you like, but it won't help you be happy in your body. Look at yourself now: you're very skinny, and yet you're concerned about being "plus-sized" in Japan. That is just bizarre. It shows that your obsession is not about weight per se, just about how other people perceive you and which category they place you in.

In the mindset you're in, I don't see how "watching your weight" is ever going to help you to be healthy and happy. Even if you starve your body, you might still be "plus-sized" in Japan, depending on your bone structure. Or you may be "normal" size in Japan, but still perceive yourself as too big, and thus rationalize that you need to starve yourself even more.

All in all, your rationalizations make no sense to other people, which should be a sign for you that your thinking is unhealthy at the moment. I don't care if your mother thinks the same; it's still a dangerous mindset.

In order to be happy about yourself, try eating healthy and tasty food, find a form of exercise you enjoy, and stop weighing yourself. Also there's really no reason to pay attention to which size you're wearing, much less to ponder which size others wear. As long as you can find some clothes that fit, you're OK.

If you accept yourself as you are, you'll be happy in every weight. And if you don't, you won't be happy in any weight (and that's where you are now). It's quite simple, really, and yet hard to implement. The first thing you need to do is TRY to listen what people are trying to tell you here. It's hard to take in, but at the moment you're not even trying.

The way you brush off the concerns off others is alarming. While yes it is important to eat healthy, it is not healthy for you to critize yourself about gaining weight and such. It is perfectly normal for girls in their teens to have their weight flucaute as your hormones are changing. So while you may gain 5kg in, lets say, 2 months it will probably go away soon enough. Don't worry when you're adult either as your body will level off to what you're suppose to be, as long as you eat healthy and exercise. You're only 13/14 so try not worry about your weight and just live life! I'm pretty sure though overall you'll probably get over this self -concious stage and grow into a beautiful woman.

P.S. There are lot more things to worry about in life as you get older trust me, so like I mention before just live life and enjoy the folly of youth.

"The rest of my food tends to be deep fried, oily and high in cholesterol... I think it's ok as those are only necessary to be cut down when one reaches middle age."

You think wrong, about this as well as many other food and health-related issues. The potential for heart-disease, high cholesterol and high blood pressure is already well-established by the time one reaches middle age. There are people in their teens who already have cholesterol plaques building up in their arteries due to high consumption of fried foods. These are the people who then may die of heart attacks in their early 40s.