Did I mess up?

So... I know this Japanese girl for a while and we always get along together very well. But yesterday while we were running out of subjects, I told her that that I have "soft spot" for Japanese girls. Because I find them to be pretty, educated and caring.

In return, she told me that she is glad that I feel this way, and that she enjoyed the fact I told her that. But I dunno... was she really telling the truth? I feel like I have messed up, and that made me sound like a "reverse-racist" or something. What do you guys think?

Hey,

I would first like to say that it's generally NOT the best idea to continue a conversation when your having to scratch the end of the barrel for conversation. It will make things go boring real quickly, haha.

Anyways, there was nothing "reverse-racist" about your comment. As for the girl, no one on this forum could say for certain how she feels. Typically, japanese girls on here tend to be very kind. Because of their friendliness, they may say something that foreigners might mistake as a "hint". My advice would be to ask her "are there many japanese girls who like foreigners?", then try to get her to say how she feels about foreigners without being too straight forward.

Best of luck!

Well, so far she must have been thinking you like her because of what she is, and now you told her that you like "Japanese girls" in general.

As a Japanese woman I can tell you it is nothing that is nice to hear. But I guess she meant it seriously when she said it was good you told her, because that told her a lot about you.

Generalizations about "foreigners" in general and "Japanese girls" in general are not really welcome, if you know what I mean.

Thank you for the answers, people.

As for the post above me, yeah. Those were more or less my fears, and seems like they were true. Thank you for being honest.

I guess there's no way to go back and revert what I said, but I certainly don't like her only because she is Japanese. I admire her personality greatly and that's what captivated me. The "soft spot" is just one of the things, but not the whole thing. If that makes any sense.

Well... hopefully things will still go fine between us. It was being perfect so far, but now due to this stupid slip, I don't know how she feels about me anymore. I guess I'll have to deal with it.

Goes to show that it is immaterial to you that she is unique, intelligent, witty. She is Japanese and that's all you care about. Imagine she said to you.I like foreigners, so I only prefer to date foreigners :)


I suspect you have fumbled the ball there....

Wait and see how your relationship is going to be in a few weeks. If she becomes distant it means that you crept her out; and if she keeps getting along with you pretty well, it means that it didn't affect her.

You should not feel guilty about what you said: as Tokyo19 wrote above, if you were "running out of subjects", it means that you already had a problem that you and the Japanese girl didn't know what else to discuss.

And I don't think that saying "I have soft spot for Japanese girls" means "I prefer to date Japanese girls". I know many people who use to say "I prefer blond girls, brown-haired girls, [...]", it sounds like what you say but it's not shocking.

You are just a new one but you will learn. Japanese girls are just like any others.the problem is the guys who are not from there . stop trying con games and act normal.

Even though she said it is nice to hear that you like japanese girls, she could be thinking: doh, he's only interested in me because I'm a cute japanese/asian chick.

you should have followed up: are you into japanese guys only or others too? which do you prefer?