i wish to look for her but i don't have much information on how to locate her.. I suppose it will be better if your friend come to greet you to her best station (which might be Hamura or Fussa or another), or she and you meet at a place in the middle, such as Mitaka Station and Southern-Terrace Gate of Shnjuku Station (both of JR-East).
the hostel is located in Minamisenju.There are Minami-senju Stations on three lines: J
oban Line (with prolonged goh) of JR-East, Hibiya Line of Tokyo Metro subway, and the line of MIR known as Tsukuba Express Line. They are located near each other.
I recommend your checking in advance how you can reach your hostel from which gate of which Minami-senju Station.
probably in terms of distance it's shorter than Narita but maybe not so convenient to reach from Haneda.. You seem to be right; NRT may be better for your case.
Taking a good combination of trains, from each airport you can get to Minami-senju with one easy transfer.
If you come to HND on a weekday, however, it might be already in morning commutersf rush hours when you get through immigration procedures.
It seems you can choose the timing from a wider range to come to NRT, avoiding mooring and evening rush.
Timetables can be revised, but as to direct flights from Singapore in this June,
planes to HND are to arrive at 05:15, 05:50, 06:00 and 23:05
(
http://www.haneda-airport.jp/inter/flight/searchFlightSchedule )
while planes to NRT are to arrive at 08:00, 08:45 and between 14:15 and 17:30
(
http://www.narita-airport.jp/en/travelplan/index.html ).
it is actually nearer to reach Tokyo from Haneda... (is it true?) Itfs true that HND is closer to urban areas of Tokyo. (Even though NRT is located not in Tokyo Metropolis but in Chiba Prefecture, its official name had been with gNew Tokyoh for many years in the past.)
However, whether HND or NRT is better may depend also on some other conditions.